Your question: Can I be a lawyer if I have social anxiety?
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Author bio
The Optimistminds editorial team is made up of psychologists, psychiatrists and mental health professionals. Each article is written by a team member with exposure to and experience in the subject matter. The article then gets reviewed by a more senior editorial member. This is someone with extensive knowledge of the subject matter and highly cited published material.
My reply:
Hi, I hope this message finds you well. My name is Cesar Guedez, a psychologist trained in cognitive behavioral therapy.
Anxiety is a universal experience. To a greater or lesser extent, we all feel anxiety at various times in our lives. Anxiety is necessary because it triggers an alert in our body, indicating that we must take action to avoid a potential threat. However, when anxiety becomes very intense and recurrent, it causes problems.
There are several types of anxiety, one of the most common is social anxiety, also known as social phobia. This problem is characterized by a persistent avoidance of social situations. People with social anxiety feel excessive embarrassment, fear and worry when they are in social situations, almost always because they are afraid of the judgment or assessment that others make of them (1).
If you are someone who is dealing with social anxiety, although you may feel alone and misunderstood, social anxiety is a fairly common problem. Approximately 12% of adults experience social anxiety, and although it is most common in young people between the ages of 18 and 29, it occurs indiscriminately regardless of age, gender or any other variable (2).
Social anxiety is a problem because it can cause people to isolate themselves and develop an overly critical judgment of themselves, leading to depression. Therefore, one should not make the mistake of confusing social anxiety with common shyness. While the former is a severe anxiety problem that can only be diagnosed by a mental health professional, shyness is a personality trait characteristic of quiet and introverted people, but does not pose a serious problem in everyday life.
If you have social anxiety you may naturally wonder if it is possible to have a fulfilling life and achieve your goals despite this. The answer is yes. Social anxiety can be an obstacle but not an impediment to achieving the things you want. People with social anxiety can work, study, make friends and have relationships, dealing with obstacles that other people do not.
Being a lawyer is a demanding job, with a predominantly social nature. The vast majority of professions require social interaction, but being a lawyer requires constant contact with other people, from clients to a judge and jury. Therefore, it is natural for you to worry and wonder if you can become a good lawyer despite having social anxiety.
The truth is that the symptoms of social anxiety are completely treatable. It is not a sentence, but an obstacle that you have to learn to overcome in order to pursue your goals. If law is the profession you desire, you will have the strength to deal with the problems of social anxiety and perform as a talented lawyer.
To do this, you must first understand the origin of social anxiety, as well as its symptoms, move on to understanding the dynamics in the law career and law profession that relate to social anxiety, and finally learn coping strategies and social skills to deal with the discomfort that social anxiety produces.
What does it feel like to have social anxiety?
Social anxiety occurs exclusively in social contexts, such as being in a crowd, on public transportation, when giving a presentation in class or at work, trying to socialize to make new friends, at a job interview, even simple everyday activities such as talking to a cashier at the grocery store.
The symptoms of social anxiety are both physical and emotional, and are generally characterized by the fear of being judged or criticized negatively by others. Other common symptoms are:
- Muscle tension.
- Tachycardia and shortness of breath.
- Anticipation of social activities well in advance, e.g., fear of a college presentation weeks before it occurs.
- Feeling of extreme embarrassment in social settings.
- Avoidance of social activities for fear of feeling anxious.
- Feeling of dizziness.
- Avoidance of eye contact.
- Feeling panic when a stranger asks you a question on the street.
- Difficulty making friends and dating.
How can a career in law and being a lawyer impact your social anxiety?
All students experience fear and anxiety at some point in their career. Evaluations, relationships with peers and professors, as well as the pressure imposed by their parents and themselves to perform with excellence in their career are universal causes of academic anxiety.
However, the career of law has been shown to generate significant anxiety in students. This is because it is a demanding career, which requires constant presentations in front of classes, debates and practices in public spaces that can generate fear and insecurities in students, especially in those with social anxiety (3).
The practice of law also has a strong social component. Lawyers must constantly talk and interact with other people. To give an impression of confidence in their work, they must maintain a moderate voice, know how to work under pressure, argue intelligently and give quick responses to clients, judges and other lawyers.
Therefore, being a lawyer can be complicated if you have social anxiety, but not impossible. Being a good lawyer depends on many factors and through coping strategies to deal with social anxiety and help from professionals, you can be an excellent lawyer without being hindered by social anxiety.
How can you be a lawyer with social anxiety?
No problem has to define your life, and social anxiety is no exception. More than an impediment, your social anxiety is an obstacle that you must overcome in order to have a productive and satisfying life. There are strategies to consider so that you can work effectively with social anxiety.
It should be noted that social anxiety can only be diagnosed by a professional, and it is advisable to see a psychologist or psychiatrist if you feel that your social anxiety is consuming your life and worsening over time.
Social anxiety has been shown to be treatable with cognitive behavioral therapy. People learn strategies that improve their quality of life, and manage to cope with overwhelming social situations through questioning their irrational thoughts and socialization and communication techniques.
Furthermore, Mindfulness has been shown to be a useful therapeutic strategy to help law students cope with their social anxiety, especially to deal with fear of public speaking. Mindfulness consists of regulating anxious thoughts typical of anxiety and modifying them for more functional ones (4).
For example, when a thought like “people are going to make fun of you” invades your mind and generates anxiety, you should confront it and give it an adaptive and functional response, confronting your fears and maintaining your security: “I will do my best to make my presentation go well”.
Other useful strategies for coping with social anxiety are:
Question your thoughts
Negative thoughts in social anxiety can ruin your life. Generally, when you are in places of socialization, thoughts like “no one wants me here”, “they sure are talking bad about me”, “I feel out of place, I should leave” come to you. It is hard work to understand that our thoughts are not facts, but this is reality.
Just because you think this way does not imply that it is the objective reality. Therefore, when these negative thoughts invade you, whether at work or in any other social space, you need to stop and question them. A functional and positive response to the above thoughts would be, “No one has said anything negative to me, I will try to fit into the space and try to start a conversation with someone.”
Breathing and relaxation
When anxiety symptoms occur, relaxation exercises are quite helpful. Close your eyes, inhale slowly for 3 seconds and exhale for another 3 seconds. Rest your hands on your abdomen and feel how the tension in your body progressively decreases. While you do this, repeat in your mind affirmation phrases, such as: “you can handle this situation, you have the strength to do it”. You can apply this exercise for 10 to 20 minutes a day.
Develop your social skills
Something like initiating a conversation with a stranger can be a nightmare for many people with social anxiety. However, these are small steps you can take to cope with the symptoms of social anxiety and learn to control them. In a notebook you can write down a simulated conversation with a stranger or an acquaintance. It will help to look in the mirror and practice. Preferably, you can make the conversation about a topic of your interest, for example, a movie you recently saw or a nice restaurant you went to.
When you find yourself in a social setting, approach a person to start the conversation. If the person doesn’t know you, introduce yourself. Start talking about the topic you had in mind and practiced earlier. At the moment you may feel tense and overwhelmed, but by the end, regardless of how long the conversation lasts, you will feel that you have taken an important step in developing your social skills. Another useful strategy is to practice public speaking, something that lawyers do in their daily lives. Remember to practice breathing exercises if you feel that during these practices your social anxiety begins to create discomfort.
In my experience…
It is certainly possible to be a lawyer with social anxiety, since it is an obstacle rather than an impediment in life. Like any obstacle, you must train to overcome it. Social anxiety can be regulated through specific techniques that help you to diminish the symptoms and to confront your fears gradually. With the help of professionals and personal dedication, you will be able to be a talented lawyer, without social anxiety paralyzing you or impeding your life achievements.
I believe you have the ability to improve and heal these feelings of discomfort you are experiencing now. The fact that you are seeking professional help through this medium proves it to me, and I applaud you for making that decision and being on track to improve your mental health and overall, your physical health.
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