Why am I so attached to my cat? (Top reasons)

In this blog post, we answer the following question: Why am I so attached to my cat? We talk about people who prefer animals to people, about the possibility of giving the pet away and how to deal with emotional attachment. 

Why are we so attached to our pets?

A pet can make up for our lack of love, becoming the centre of our emotional universe.

Someone who, for various reasons, does not have children, can supplement the maternal or paternal need by the presence of a pet.

Not infrequently we have heard people calling their puppy or cat “come to mommy“, “to daddy“, or they told us how they bought clothes for the four-legged, even from the company, took them to the spa, they coloured their nails or fur.

When it comes to their pets, some people forget about their sense of proportion so that they can end up in emotionally dangerous situations. However, in any form of love or attachment, it is good to keep a balance.

People get attached to their dogs, cats and even fishes if they have them as pets.

Emotional deficiency

The pet is the perfect choice if you want to have a soul with you from which you can constantly receive and offer evidence of affection most of the time in the way you want, without having to have too many discussions or explanations.

This need for affection can reach the threshold of emotional deprivation if your only quality emotional relationships are with animals.

Then, yes, it is most likely an emotional issue that needs your attention.

Certainly, there are cases when the pet fills certain emotional gaps, unmet emotional needs, the disappearance of a loved one in your life (whether we are talking about death, divorce or other contexts) are those situations when you want to fill your house and the soul with someone.

A pet does not ask questions, does not make judgments or pretensions, he loves you unconditionally, you too, a situation that can meet your basic human emotional needs.

A perfectly normal and healthy thing, recommended and encouraged by therapists, as long as it does not turn into a flight or fear of people, intimate relationships and socialization.

Those who prefer animals to people

Lack of emotional balance, untreated wounds from the past, disappointment, suffering cause some people to fulfil their need for affection and presence through the pet.

It is thus transformed into a substitute for interpersonal relationships, whether we are talking about the parent-child or woman-man relationship.

Those who have lost confidence in themselves or those around them, in interpersonal relationships, will exaggerate their care, attention and affection to the pet or to the animals on the street, in shelters.

Behind these behaviours is well hidden the fear of a new disappointment, of suffering, and this fear – if it does not receive the proper attention and treatment – leads, in the human-pet relationship, to pathological behaviours.

Of course, there are those people who have pets and feel very good in their presence, but without having a pathological behaviour.

They have a busy professional and social life, and when they get home, after a day at the office full of meetings and discussions, they prefer moments of peace and tacit affection within the family, of which the animals are part, without being anything strange or sick. in this.

 “Training” for future parents

There is a saying that if you want to know how ready you are for a child, take a pet.

Although the demands and needs are far from comparable, there are some changes in the schedule and daily routine somewhat common: feeding, changing (sand) regularly, going out every day for a walk, going to the doctor, etc.

These activities, the way you relate to them, can help you get an idea of ​​how ready you are to sacrifice your time and comfort for a child.

Giving up the pet

When, for various reasons, medical or not only, you have to give up the animal you have loved and cared for a long time, the struggle between reason and affection begins.

Maybe a solution would be to put on paper what you gain and what you lose in terms of risks and emotional benefits for both parties involved: you and your pet.

Affective rupture is generally a trauma, from any point of view we choose to discuss it, whether it is a child, partner, parent or pet.

However, the dimensions, the time in which you heal, the marks left are debatable from case to case and depend on the temperament, the emotional sensitivity of each one, as well as the emotional connection that was between the parties involved.

Deep symbols

Can the pet be sick and old involved in a repair process? That is, we make every effort to save him. What if, in fact, we saved someone dear to us who died?

Well, if in our past there are such traumas related to the loss of a loved one, it is certainly possible that the subconscious overlaps these painful situations and automatically transposes us into the same fears, panics and emotions.

It is important to say “stop”, to detach and realize that it is a defence reaction of the mind, to start to make – at a conscious level – the difference between situations, so as not to repeat the pain, trauma and mourning.

 15 cats and 8 dogs…

These people who have many animals at home, who are still rescuing puppies and kittens from the street, are part of the Savior’s typology – talking here about the psychological triangle Victim-Savior-Persecutor.

There are wounds from their childhood or past that time has settled on, but not healing.

Their basic need – when rescuing animals from the street and reaching a considerable number of pets – is to provide (shelter, food).

It is a need that they may have been deprived of in certain situations, and the emotions of insecurity have left serious marks on them.

Now, covering these needs of animals, the Savior feels protected, loved, rewarded.

A normal relationship

Loving your pet is perfectly normal, with beneficial effects on both sides. I think the relationship is good to be similar to the parent-child relationship.

This means that everything does not revolve only around the animal or your own child, to have other concerns, to leave the space, freedom, independence, to be like a compliment, not to fill a gap in this way.

Cat person vs dog person

Denise Guastallo, a professor of psychology at Carroll University in the United States, conducted a study involving 600 students.

They were asked which is their favourite animal, then they were subjected to a test to determine personality traits.

The results presented at the annual meeting of the Association for Psychological Science in 2014 showed that people with a strong preference for dogs were really different from those who loved cats.

Puppy followers tended to be more energetic, open, willing to follow the rules, while cat lovers proved to be more introverted, sensitive, with broader views and a tendency toward nonconformism.

Of course, there are some limiting beliefs in the middle such as “I love dogs because they are sincere, cats are cunning and selfish”, but, in fact, the differences between these animals are breed, different needs and, obviously, different typologies.

People also want to know if, like them cats are emotionally attached to their owners?

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FAQ on Why am I so attached to my cat?

Do cats get attached to their owners?

Yes, cats can get attached to their owners, just like dogs and other pets can do, according to the journal Current Biology Journal

Why is my cat so attached to me lately?

Your cat can suddenly be more attached because they need you for comfort and support. Perhaps your cat is going through a stressful time, and you should notice any changes in its behaviour, eating and sleeping habits. 

Do cats have a favourite person?

Yes, cats can have a favourite person. Most of the time this is the person who plays and pets them the most. It is perfectly normal for cats to get attached to their owners. 

How do you tell if your cat is bonded with you?

You can tell if your cat is bonded with you if they are doing grooming behaviours such as licking the hair or ears in front of you. Generally, you will know if a cat likes you.

Do cats forgive abuse?

Cats do not forgive abuse. They are among the animals who do not forgive those who hurt them. 

Conclusions

In this blog post, we answered the following question: Why am I so attached to my cat? We talked about people who prefer animals to people, about the possibility of giving the pet away and how to deal with emotional attachment. 

Lack of emotional balance, untreated wounds from the past, disappointment, suffering cause some people to fulfil their need for affection and presence through the pet.

It is thus transformed into a substitute for interpersonal relationships, whether we are talking about the parent-child or woman-man relationship.

Certainly, there are cases when the pet fills certain emotional gaps, unmet emotional needs, the disappearance of a loved one in your life (whether we are talking about death, divorce or other contexts) are those situations when you want to fill your house and the soul with someone.

If you have questions or comments, please let us know!

What we recommend for Relationship & LGBTQ issues

Relationship counselling

  • If you are having relationship issues or maybe you are in an abusive relationship then relationship counselling could be your first point of call. Relationship counselling could be undertaken by just you, it does not require more than one person.

LGBTQ issues

If you are dealing with LGBTQ issues then LGBTQ counselling may be a great option for you. Maybe you are confused as to your role and identity or simply need someone to speak to. LGBTQ counsellors are specially trained to assist you in this regard.

References

Psychologytoday.com – How Emotionally Attached Are You to Your Pet?

Theveterinaryexpert.com – Are we too attached to our pets?

Sciencealert.com – Cats Bond Securely to Their Humans Maybe Even More Than Dogs Do

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