In this article, we shall talk about what it means when a guy tells you he has to poop. We will begin by understanding what are the signs you should pick on if he has the poop conversation with you, then we will talk about why it is not awkward, in fact, essential to have a poop conversation if you are in a meaningful relationship. As absurd as that sounds, trust that it will open your minds to newer horizons of meaning and closeness in a relationship.
What signs should you pick up on when a guy tells you he has to poop?
Is talking about pooping really limited to just the descriptions of pooping or does it mean more?
It surely does mean more. Here are some signs:
- He is comfortable with you.
- He wishes to develop a meaningful relationship with you.
- He is testing his boundaries with you.
- He is encouraging you to be your raw self with him.
To know in detail about these signs read further.
Before that, I have a question for all couples out there, regardless of how many days or months, or years you have been together. How often have you talked about your bowel movements with your partner?
If your answer is ‘never’ or ‘rarely ever’, let me attempt to convince you to get talking about the daily dumps. Because this is not merely just about the shits you are passing, it is also about the other kinds of shit you are tolerating, hiding, or even embarrassed about.
But if your answer is ‘often’ and your guy talks about poop or tells you he has to poop, you are one of the lucky ones. Read on to know why!
He is comfortable with you
This is the most obvious takeaway from his revelations that you must gather. Talking about our bodies and processes within the body is difficult because it is a very intimate thing. When we take the decision to tell someone about our body, share our physical self with someone it is an indication or expression of psychological and emotional comfort.
Sex surely has become much more casual now and it may be not be viewed with the sense of unison anymore but satisfying personal needs. But even in sex, actually taking the efforts of talking about your needs, desires and your body is challenging for many than engaging in the act.
Pooping is a much more natural and necessary bodily function and process than sex but we fail to give it the importance it should be given because it is a topic thrown in the ‘taboo’ category. Breaking taboos and expressing yourself shows a level of comfort and appreciation for the security experienced with the partner in the relationship.
He wishes to develop a meaningful understanding of you and your relationship with him
Unless he wishes to expand the horizons of the relationship with you, he would never have this conversation. If he has the poop talk, know that he is pretty serious about being with you and considering you as his person.
He also believes you are someone with whom he can have all kinds of conversations in life without the fear of being judged.
He is testing his boundaries with you
Even in successful and healthy relationships, where the couples are happy with each other, there could be some non-negotiables.
Talking about menstrual cycles, mental health struggles, reproductive health concerns, etc are all associated with some sort of stigma in many cultures, even today. It is taboo. And sadly, talking about pooping is also considered shameful. For people who have been so conditioned to not talk about it, it can be difficult to open up.
If a guy talks to you about pooping, it must be his way of testing the limits of the kinds of conversations he can have with you.
He is encouraging you to be your raw self with him
Believe me, talking about pooping does not indicate it’s just about pooping. It is about unlearning the ways society taught you to inhibit the free expression of everything that is natural and very human to feel.
If your guy talks about pooping with you, consider it as an invitation to bare open your true self in front of him. It is an invitation to let go of any inhibitions and apprehensions you may have about not being able to showcase yourself as who you truly are.
Why is it important to have the poop conversation?
A poop conversation is where you talk about your bowel movements, gut health, and difficulties or ease of passing motions.
Having talks about taking a dump, wanting to take a dump, or not being able to take a dump is important because it is the most natural process involved with you being a human. But, society, at large, considers it to be a matter to be reserved with such secrecy, that it is so personal, only you should be aware of your poops and nobody else.
Moreso, the intention in a romantic relationship, is often pleasing and impressing the other person. And while doing so, you obviously talk about all things that are good and pretty in your life. Pooping is often not attached with these adjectives. Couples who are just purely themselves, having zero percent of facades are very rare. But it is important to let go of the facades of having everything being perfect in order to develop a deep healthy and meaningful relationship. Is that not what everyone in a relationship desires? (Also, gut-wise, good poops indicate everything is perfect.)
What to expect when you have the poop talk?
Awkwardness to get talking about it
In the beginning, it might be difficult to bring up the topic. You sure wish your conversations with your lover to be as passionate and romantic as possible along with the itsy-bitsy details of everyday life. But those details barely ever involve talks about your gut health, bowel movements, poop problems, etc. It is really surprising that there is so much shame involved in talking about the most natural thing that literally everybody does.
Conversations about pooping can bring out the second-grade kid that is hiding within you somewhere who laughs on poop, fart, and burp jokes. But know that it is an important conversation that can ignite some fun and laughter in the relationship.
Just in case you did not know, here are some fun facts:
Even the prettiest, glamourous or richest person has to poop regularly. They cannot make their poops as pretty as their faces or outsource it to someone.
Every person gets the loosies or the too tightsies at some time, that’s life.
Nobody’s poop smells like a garden of roses or lavenders.
So, it is absolutely okay if there is fun teasing, mocking, and laughing about poops.
Talking about something personal like the state of your stomach and taking good dumps can bring you closer to your partner. You do not go about doing poop talks with just anyone. You do it with a person to who you wish to bare your true self.
In fact, I can go to the extent of saying that having sex with your someone/lover does not get you as close as talking about pooping does. For one, sex has become a casual thing these days but it is not just about that. Sex and sex talks involve you putting your best self forward in order to impress the other person. Whereas, talking about pooping is just plain personal and intimate. It is raw and not even pretty or charming. But if you can have a comfortable conversation about it, you can be considered as very close.
Broken barriers of shame
Letting your guard down and talking about having unsatisfactory poops or really amazing poops can only be done in situations where there is no inhibition or fear of being judged.
Imagine the pressure on the person (pun intended) when they have to hold it in just because they are with their partner and do not want to look ridiculous, just because they want to poop. Guess how much easier it would be if you could just tell your partner “Be right back, just got to take a dump.” What is the worst that could happen? If your partner gets so ridiculed by it and leaves, then so be it. Let them go!
Respecting and accepting each other as wholesome and natural humans
Above all, what we need to remember is, pooping is a natural thing that all humans do regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, finances, or any other thing that can be considered as factors creating rifts between people. Accepting and having honest conversations about pooping makes you just human where you let the other person also be just that beyond any labels and criteria.
In this article, we talked about what it means when a guy tells you he has to poop. We began by understanding what are the signs you should pick on if he has the poop conversation with you, then we talked about why it is not awkward, in fact, essential to have a poop conversation if you are in a meaningful relationship. We also looked at how this conversation expands newer horizons of meaning and closeness in a relationship.
Frequently Asked Questions: When a guy tells you he has to poop
Why does it feel good to poop?
Our brains function essentially on a reward pathway system which gets its happy dose when a task is completed. The vagus nerve in our brain receives the signal after pooping and sends us the message on a good job, well done making us feel content and happy.
The feel-good sensation has been given a term too, it is called poo-phoria.
Why do I cry when I poop?
Well, it is not a healthy sign if you are crying when you are pooping. The tears surely come from a painful sensation down there. Usually, because of constipation, the pressure required for you to push the poop forward through the colon is much more when your bowels are healthy. The high amount of pressure strains the organs, nerves, blood vessels all at once which might be causing the sensation of pain and therefore the release of tears.
Consult a doctor and improve your diet and lifestyle immediately.
Why do men’s poop smell worse?
We cannot clearly compare that a man’s poop smells worse than a woman’s because ‘The cause of stinky poops’ is more of a person-to-person concept rather than a gender-based one.
The smell of poops is determined by the bacteria in our guts and the absorption-malabsorption of food. The kind of bacterial culture in all our stomachs varies depending on our diets, so does the efficiency of absorption. When a person is on medication of any kind, especially antibiotics again the smells of the gasses and the poops change. The hormone estrogen in women surely does help them with the motility of their colons but it does not do much for the smells produced.
What we recommend for Relationship & LGBTQ issues
- If you are having relationship issues or maybe you are in an abusive relationship then relationship counselling could be your first point of call. Relationship counselling could be undertaken by just you, it does not require more than one person.
If you are dealing with LGBTQ issues then LGBTQ counselling may be a great option for you. Maybe you are confused as to your role and identity or simply need someone to speak to. LGBTQ counsellors are specially trained to assist you in this regard.