5 signs they are a Somatic narcissist (+ 3 tips)

In this brief blog, we will be talking about somatic narcissists, traits of a somatic narcissist, how to deal with a somatic narcissist, and more information about a somatic narcissist.

What Is A Somatic Narcissist As A Type Of Narcissist?

A somatic narcissist is a type of narcissist that takes pride in his or her body.

These kinds of narcissists use their body to be the centre of admiration and jealousy from other people. 

In this case, these kinds of narcissists are more concentrated on clothes and their appearances.

Somatic narcissists are also very occupied with sex encounters. 

Somatic narcissists use people for their sexual pleasure and they are confident that when they ask for sex, they are more likely to get it.

These kinds of narcissists like to visualize that everyone wants to be with them and every person is very attracted to them.

 Somatic narcissists tend to self-medicate their pain from insecurities by having sex and can become addicted to sex.

Although these kinds of narcissists can also get their narcissistic needs met by getting attention thanks to their appearances which are enough as well aside from self-medicating through sex. 

Since somatic narcissists self-medicate through sex, they are more likely to have multiple partners and the possibility of making unfaithful relationships.

Traits Of A Somatic Narcissist

A somatic narcissist is someone who is so concentrated on his or her physical being.

These kinds of narcissists know that they can get anything they want from others due to their physical charms. 

Somatic narcissists don’t miss a chance to show off their bodies to other people.

These kinds of narcissists take pride in their bodies that they’re not afraid of taking excessive amounts of surgery to make themselves more beautiful.

Somatic narcissists will bring themselves to chronic activities that will make them more beautiful such as excessive exercise and restrictions in eating meals.

For these kinds of narcissists, their bodies are their ultimate weapons to get the people they want.

 You can learn more about these kinds of narcissists by buying this book on this website.

The following are some of the traits of a somatic narcissist that will be discussed in the further sections.

  • Need for approval
  • All about appearances and bodies
  • Excessive vanity
  • Need for a sexual relationship and not an intimate relationship
  • Abusing partners

Need For Approval From Others

The somatic narcissist is always looking for approval just like most narcissists.

These narcissists are very focused on getting praise and admiration for their bodies.

 Somatic narcissists can’t deal with criticism even if it’s constructive. These narcissists are also focused in their excellent performances in bed.

You might be dating a somatic narcissist if you have observed him or her to get your approval every time they dress up.

This is what they need to add up in their narcissistic supply which will be discussed in the further sections.

 Somatic narcissists only perceive people as those who can fill up that void of approval that was lacking in their childhood years.

These kinds of narcissists tend to compliment people who are gorgeous as they are according to their bodies.

All About Appearances

A major symptom of this somatic narcissist is that he or she focuses on the physical self.

As mentioned before, these narcissists are very in tune with their physical bodies that they have to eat the perfect meal that can get them fit, wear the best clothes, and have the perfect skin.

 Somatic narcissists will get overwhelmingly disappointed if they couldn’t meet these perfect body standards.

These narcissists are very worried about what may occur to their bodies if they eat the wrong food or drinks which makes them have illness anxiety. 

Somatic narcissists are not tolerant about another person being complimented for his or her body.

With their activities, they will be more likely to be found in gyms and a fancy clothes store.

Somatic narcissists are very enthusiastic when they get the chance to show off their bodies to the people around them.

These narcissists would take great self-esteem even if there was only one person who speaks highly of their bodies. 

Somatic narcissists make sure that they eat the best recipes that can upgrade their bodies into the perfect body which you can get from this recipe book bought on this website. 

Excessive Vanity

You might have experienced being with someone who likes to show off that they are having the best clothes and the best accessories such as a new car from the neighbourhood.

When it comes to somatic narcissists, they excessively seek the attention of others to see if their possessions, especially the body is great. 

Some people are prone to showing off some of their possessions from time-to-time but somatic narcissists take great pride when they show off their perfect lifestyles to other people.

From their need for perfection, these narcissists are taking the steps to become the perfect human being.

When you are in the middle of this flaunting session of a somatic narcissist, you shouldn’t show them that you disapprove of their belongings since this will bring them disappointment in themselves.

This characteristic is very typical in these narcissists. 

After all, narcissist came from the man who realized he liked his reflection more than his admirer.

In this case, somatic narcissists are used getting their narcissistic supply from the vanity they feel from others.

Constant Need For A Sexual Relationship

If you’re in a relationship with a somatic narcissist, you might have noticed that they are more inclined to do sex for the performance and not for the emotional attachment felt for each other.

For these narcissists, sex will not be about two individual coming and conjoined together to express affection to each other.

 For somatic narcissists, sex will be something that should focus on the performance such as making sure that the partner is doing what is expected of him or her in a sexual relationship.

The love in making love is not present in a relationship with this narcissist.

Somatic narcissists are more likely to engage in sex with their partner for their own sexual pleasure.

This is why these narcissists can appear abusive to their partners.

This characteristic is very apparent in other narcissists which will be elaborated in the further sections.

You can learn more about how people who were in a sexual relationship with these narcissists cope with the constant abuse by buying this book on this website. 

Abusive Towards Partners

They can’t find it satisfying if someone else is more beautiful or handsome than them.

In this case, these narcissists won’t hesitate in trying to bring that person down. 

For these narcissists, you should be inferior for them. These people should be the grand person in the room they may walk in. 

In this case, you have a relationship with this narcissist where you are going to be humiliated through.

These people are callous and would rather remain to have the highest position in society.

 This situation can lead partners to release their disappointments to their narcissist partners or their loved ones.

These affected partners will suffer long-term low self-esteem from the abuse.

Narcissistic Supply

Narcissists are described in psychoanalytic theory as someone who is orally fixated to getting admiration from other people without taking into account other people’s feelings or opinions.

Otto Finechel was the psychoanalyst who found out about this kind of concept to talk about people who find the admiration of others as essential requirements for their confidence.

 These kinds of people don’t take lightly the negative feelings that other people may have for such as anger annoyance.

This just makes these kinds of people more abusive since they are more inclined to care about themselves than other people. 

Due to their supply for self-esteem, they become fixated on doing dysfunctional behaviours just to have some ounce of self-esteem in their systems.

This knowledge can only make their self-esteem lower than before. 

These kinds of people don’t have the means to attain their self-esteem so they have to depend on others for this kind of feeling.

You can learn more about this supply in these kinds of people by buying this book on this website.

Signs That You Are Dealing With A Somatic Narcissist

Katherine Schafler is a psychotherapist who explained that these kinds of narcissists are focuses on showing their bodies when they are seeking admiration from people.

The standardized manual of mental disorders don’t group narcissists into different classes but some psychologists have grouped into the following classes:

  • Cerebral narcissists who feel dominant due to their intellect
  • Sexual narcissists who get their sense of entitlement from sexual circumstances
  • Somatic narcissists whose feelings of self-esteem come from their bodies

These kinds of classes aren’t medical diagnosis under the realm of narcissistic personality disorder.

Researchers have found that these classes of narcissists seem to be predominant to people with this kind of disorder.

 These kinds of classes would indicate that they are several domains that these kinds of narcissists focus on.

The following are typical characteristics of these somatic narcissist partners which will be discussed the further sections.

  •  They use sex for self-esteem.
  • They criticize people based on appearance.
  • They take credit for your accomplishments.
  • They gaslight you.
  • They can’t stand criticism.

They Use Sex For Self-Esteem

Scott-Hudson stated that these narcissists are focused on attaining desirability through their bodies.

As mentioned before, these narcissists see their physical appearances as ways to attaining dominance through people. 

Narcissists of this kind that are female are proud that they are the other woman in a committed relationship due to their sexual prowess.

As mentioned before, these people are willing to show off their bodies to people who will clearly envy them.

You can learn more about how these narcissists handle sexual relationships by buying this book on this website.

They Judge People Through Appearances

Scott-Hudson added that these narcissists are more likely to keep maintaining their dominance by putting others down in the process.

In this case, these people aren’t afraid about calling others who are fat or old even in the presence of other people. 

These people are more likely to scrutinize others and make them feel like they should do something about it by telling them what to eat or wear.

These people know that they are entitled to make these pieces of advice to these people since they are better than them.

They always expect perfection to go their way.

In this case, they will also be expecting people to shower them with love and adoration due to their perfection. 

When they converse with other people, they are more likely to talk about themselves and would talk about their accomplishments.

You could see that it won’t be easy having one of these people as your intimate partner.

They Take Credit For Your Accomplishments

This is where these narcissists try to use their non-emathic ways to their partners.

When they are talking to someone who is more interested in what their partner wants to say, they become too attention-seeking by making sure the conversation stays on their side.

They will even take the accomplishment of the partner and make the conversation sound like the partner won’t be able to accomplish such a feat without them.

This is what creates annoyance in the partners about this narcissistic partner.

Gaslighting Is A Somatic Narcissist’s Game

Gaslighting is the most popular manipulation tactic used by every narcissist.

Scott-Hudson states that narcissists are very good at this that it becomes their favourite sport to play. 

This tactic is used to weaken and demoralize the victim which in this case is the partner.

This is where the narcissist will be blaming you on a fault that he or she is more guilty of and appearing that you two are on the same boat. 

You are sensitive to this tactic if you are described to be a people-pleaser or a dependent person.

Some partners may not be easily swayed by this tactic but this narcissist will make them comply. 

This is a regular tactic when the narcissist already knows about the family members and loved ones of the partner.

This will become very abusive unless stopped since the partner will be forced to do the narcissist’s bidding which can lead to a separate line between the partner and his or her loved ones. 

Trauma is very possible to partners who were victimized by this tactic from their partners.

Somatic Narcissists Can’t Stand Criticism

Schafler states that these narcissists are not capable of hearing criticism from other people.

This is called narcissistic injury in psychological terms where the person feels conflicted and depressed about a certain lack of characteristic. 

These narcissists will be responding with despondence and aggression.

This is mostly true when these narcissists are criticised for their physical appearances.

Why Are People Attracted To Somatic Narcissists?

Some people are attracted to somatic narcissists due to their attractive prowess in their bodies.

People who find themselves attracted to this kind of narcissist will be more likely to have some insecurities about their bodies. 

Some people believe that when they are taken by an attractive person, they are more likely to share those beautiful physical traits of the person and in a way, they will feel a little complete.

These kinds of people are more likely to not understand that some people who are more focused about physical appeal may not be great romantic partners in the long run. 

These kinds of narcissists are not likely to have the skills and resources needed by a healthy romantic partner.

Also, your idealisation with this kind of partner will only lead to more trouble on yourself. 

If you are idealising this kind of narcissist for their looks, you are only looking at them at the surface level.

The surface level is quite far from the true nature of a person which is not a mark of healthy and true relationship.

Recovery From Somatic Narcissist Attraction

We should find time to look into ourselves on what we are missing in our lives that made us attracted to this kind of narcissist.

You can find some ways that can help you better to deal with your insecurities about your attractiveness and going with an attractive person is not a healthy way to deal with this kind of insecurity. 

If we keep seeking the outer selves of people, we are only making ourselves more insecure about our physical attractiveness.

We should be more understanding that beauty also comes in the inside which can dominate and influence us to change the outside.

We should also realize that parenting ourselves on our lack of a characteristic is a better way of dealing with this insecurities.

This kind of attraction is part of our unconscious style in behaving where we are prone to get attracted to this kind of narcissist to fill our lack of beauty. 

These kinds of narcissists will only bring your pains out in the surface which will not become a good situation for you.

You must realize that you shouldn’t let this kind of narcissist define your view of beauty since these people are also confused about true beauty as well.


In this brief blog, we have talked about somatic narcissists, traits of a somatic narcissist, how to deal with a somatic narcissist, and more information about a somatic narcissist.

If you have any questions about a somatic narcissist, please let us know and the team will gladly answer your queries.

FAQs: somatic narcissist

What is narcissistic victim syndrome?

The narcissistic victim syndrome is a set of symptoms and signs that a person has when intimate with a narcissist.

A narcissist can make the intimate partner his or her victim once he or she has shown affection to the victim that can make them dependent on the narcissist.

The problem is this kind of syndrome isn’t heavily studied in psychological literature.

How do you know if you’re in a narcissistic relationship?

You will know when you are in a narcissistic relationship if the partner frequently threatens you, the partner acts entitled to some needs, the partner makes you feel remorse, the partner believes that he or she is special, the partner tends to be hot and then cold, the partner thinks that the rules don’t apply to them, the partner is manipulative, and the partner has an obsessive focus on the shallow aspects of a person.

Can a narcissist love?

No, a narcissist can’t love or show real affection. You can be enthralled and misunderstood that for love with this person.

But being close and love are not the same things.

Enmeshment is an uncommon relationship circumstance that can be very hard to identify when it’s happening to you.

What is an inverted narcissist?

An inverted narcissist is a subtype of a covert narcissist.

The inverted narcissist is a co-dependent who depends exclusively on narcissists (narcissist-co-dependent).

The inverted narcissist craves to be in a relationship with a narcissist, regardless of any abuse inflicted on her.

How do you pacify a narcissist?

You can pacify a narcissist by not arguing about right and wrong with them, use the ‘we’ language, try to empathise with their feelings, don’t expect an apology from them, don’t take baits from them, ask about a subject that interests them, and remember to put your needs first.

Do narcissists have low self-esteem?

Yes, narcissists have low self-esteem. If you are living with a narcissistic personality disorder, you are likely selfish, boastful, and ignore others’ feelings and needs.

It was once thought that individuals suffering from narcissistic personality disorder have high self-esteem on the surface, but deep down are insecure.

Do narcissists feel guilt?

Yes, narcissists feel guilt. Narcissists are described as individuals with dysfunctional personality traits such as lack of psychological awareness and empathy.

Theories of ethical behaviour assume that unethical actions trigger moral emotions of guilt and shame.


Decision Making Confidence. Somatic Narcissist.

Mbgrelationships. 7 Signs You’re Dealing With A Somatic Narcissist.

Melanie Tonia Evans. Somatic Narcissists – The Complete Guide.

Psychologia. 5 Signs They Are a Somatic Narcissist.

Psychology Today. 8 Signs You’re in a Relationship with a Sexual Narcissist.

Wikipedia. Narcissistic supply.

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