Single father depression(+how to deal with it)
By
OptimistMinds
As a BetterHelp affiliate, we may receive compensation from BetterHelp if you purchase products or services through the links provided.
Author bio
The Optimistminds editorial team is made up of psychologists, psychiatrists and mental health professionals. Each article is written by a team member with exposure to and experience in the subject matter. The article then gets reviewed by a more senior editorial member. This is someone with extensive knowledge of the subject matter and highly cited published material.
This article will discuss what single father depression is, what can cause people to develop it, its signs, and what are ways to cope with it.
What is single father depression?
Being a single father is never easy. As a matter of fact, any form of single parenting takes a lot of work. And although it has become more and more frequent, it is something that can have a huge impact on the physical and emotional health of the parent.
It can be a huge source of stress to focus on all of the kids’ needs, and sometimes it can make it easy to forget about their own needs. Like couples that are raising their kids together, the single father is also worried about doing the right thing. If they are stimulating their kids properly, or if they feel loved.
But when you are a single father, adding to all the concerns, is the fact that you have to decide everything for yourself. This can lead to a lot of fear and guilt. Along with that, when you are a single father you will have to consider all of the financial needs, family relationships, and custody arrangements.
Single father depression is that overwhelming feeling a single parent has, that can cause them to feel drained, sad, and depressed. It can change their mood, usually causing the father to feel anxious, and irritated. Along with that, their immune system can get worse, leading to illnesses.
Feeling this drained can make them less motivated, energetic, and productive. It can be that a depressed father starts to develop some pains, such as headache, or muscle tensions, along with stomach problems. Not only that, their sleep pattern can change, along with their appetite.
There are some fundamental reasons that can lead to single father depression. Let’s discuss what they are.
What causes single father depression?
Single father depression can be caused by multiple factors. It can be that the father feels the lack of support from the people around them. They can devote so much time and energy in caring for the child, that they can feel isolated from other people.
Along with that, the custody arrangements, which sometimes can lead to battles, can be a huge source of stress. To have an organized custody schedule it is important for parents to communicate often, and trying to fix it with both of their availability and needs is not always easy.
But when a parent has full custody of the child, the custody arrangement is not needed, but a lot more responsibilities come with it. They will be the only provider of that kid, and need to constantly worry about their well-being. All of that must be faced alone, without a partner.
And although all of this can feel overwhelming, there are some ways a single father can cope with such a situation. Let’s learn what are ways to cope with single father depression.
What are ways to deal with father depression?
If you are a single father, and you realize that taking care of your kid alone is taking a toll on your emotional well-being, causing you to feel stressed, anxious, and depressed, there are some things you can start doing.
Take some time to yourself
Although it can be hard to find some time in your single father schedule, try to set some specific time to do something you enjoy. It can be visiting friends, reading, or even taking a long, warm bath.
If you need to ask some of your family members or friends to watch your kid for sometime, while you take time for yourself, it can help. Try to understand what works in your dinamic, so you can make some time for yourself.
Don’t surrender to the guilt
Parents are often guilty. They feel like they are never doing enough, especially a single parent. It is what can prevent you from taking some time for yourself, but don’t let that get into your head.
Keep in mind that a happy parent will be a great parent. So invest in your well-being with no guilt, and know that this will also be in the benefit of your child.
Keep positive
When you are a single parent, not only the decision making can be lonely, but also the negative thoughts. When you have a partner with you, and you start to spiral down on the negative, they can quickly help you out of it, by giving you a reality check.
But when you are alone, it can be harder to come out of it. Try to avoid it, and keep in mind that the anxiety and negativity that are in you can show up in your relationship with your kid.
Open yourself for help
Even though you are a single parent, it doesn’t mean you need to handle everything alone. Open yourself up to the support network you have around you. It can be family members, friends, and there are even support groups that can offer you a way to connect with people that are going through similar experiences.
Set boundaries
Being a single parent can consume so much of your energy that it is important to set boundaries for yourself. Don’t let anyone come and take advantage of you. Be in places and relationships that add to your well-being, and not drain you even more.
Manage your stress
Another thing you need to do when dealing with single father depression is managing your stress level. You can do that by taking care of your eating and sleeping habits. Those will improve your sense of well-being.
Mental health support, such as therapy can also be a lot of help when managing stress. Having a person you can share your feelings with, and learn how to deal with them, can be of great help.
Along with that, you can try to bring to your routine some form of relaxation. It can be a breathing exercise, meditation, or even yoga. Those will help you center yourself when the crazy parenting routine takes over.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ): What is single father depression?
What are the biggest challenges of being a single dad?
Being a single dad may cause you to worry about financial matters a lot more than if you had a partner. Along with that, it can cause you to be concerned about how your relationship, and divorce may affect your child. And how each new relationship you start can have a huge impact on them.
Along with that, being a single dad can make it hard for you to find some balance. It can be a learning process of how you can handle your work life, your home life with your children, your relationship with other family members, and other new relationships that you may come to develop.
Have in mind that there is no clear cut recipe for this, and try to find a balance that works for you.
How can single dads fight loneliness?
Being a single dada can be lonely at times, but you can try to work on your sense of belonging. On having people and places where you feel most at home with. And if you experience moments of loneliness, which everyone does, learn how you can fill them with positive things, so you can re energize yourself.
To avoid the loneliness you can join the PTA, or support groups that are directed to single parents. Having new places to be in touch with people will work wonders. But that is not only true about new activities and people in your life, have your loved ones close to you.
Call them, arrange meetings, and even if you don’t feel like talking, be around them.
You can also work on activities you can do by yourself, such as reading a book or meditating. Those will make you realize how you can take something positive from being alone, that it is not only loneliness that comes with it. With all of those strategies maybe you will be able to not feel so lonely.
What benefits can a single parent have?
When you are a single parent there are some benefits you have to help you provide for your kid. There are forms of income support that will help you get a better income. Along with that, you may be eligible for some lines of credit that will make it easier for you to access it.
Along with that, you may get help on your rent or mortgage, which can help you on your housing arrangements, and is allowed to get paid when you take sick days off.
Along with those, if your child goes to school, they can receive the uniforms and apply for free meals. Along with having support for health treatments, such as dental treatment.
What are the downsides of dating a single dad?
If you are thinking about dating a single dad, you should consider that they have less time available. Because they need to take care of their children, they will most likely be busier than other single men, and have different responsibilities.
And it is not only a responsibility to spend time with the child, there are financial, and moral responsibilities that they need to focus on. Along with that, if they have joint custody, there is an ex on the scene, and you might try to understand how that relationship is, and how it can impact your relationship with him.
What are ways to be a successful single dad?
Being a single dad can be overwhelming, but there are some ways you can guarantee that you are doing a great job. The first is to try and maintain your calm in challenging times.
Those will certainly come when you are a single dad, but not getting too stressed or emotional during it can be a way to think things over and make the right decision.
Avoid getting in that mindset that you criticize your ex. This can have a negative impact on your children, and it is a way of holding on to all the grudges and negative emotions, which are not good for you as well.
And always remember that your child’s well-being is closely connected to your own. So care for your happiness as well, don’t let yourself go, and your child will also experience the benefits of having a happy and fulfilled dad.
Conclusion
This article discussed what single father depression is, how it can happen, and what are the signs that you can be going through it. Along with that, the article explained what are ways to deal with single father depression.
If you have any questions or comments about this article, feel free to write it in the section below.
References
https://www.healthline.com/health/single-parenting-and-depression
https://www.verywellmind.com/single-parenting-stress-how-to-beat-burnout-5216180
Was this helpful?
Overcome Depression and Find Joy in Life Again with BetterHelp
