Should I text my ex?(How to know)

Should I text my ex – A brief guide to understanding the reasons why you think you should text your ex.

In this guide, we will discuss if you really should text your ex or just never speak to your ex again.

Should I text my ex?

People meet other people daily. They engage in conversations and reach a point where they know each other more, which in some cases can lead to some kind of attraction that ends in a relationship.

When two people are in a relationship, in many cases they both feel good because they have someone by their side apart from their friends and family with whom to count and share their things. Many yearn to have a partner to enjoy life with.

One of the most difficult situations that a person can go through is when the relationship ends and even more when the person is left. Both people in the relationship may feel bad because, although you may have feelings towards the other person, in the end, it was right to end the relationship. I think you can identify with this since sometime in life people will experience a breakup.

When the relationship ends in many cases there is always one of the parties that are constantly thinking about their former partner. If you have experienced a break recently or a while ago, you may feel identified. 

You have reached a point where you would like to know if your ex still thinks of you, if it misses you or if it loved you. Over time, not seeing that you do not receive any kind of greeting or call from your ex, start thinking if it would be correct to reestablish communication with your ex. Within you, the thought begins to arise: should I text my ex?

The thought of should I text my ex begins to become more persistent. You start looking inside you for the reasons why you should do it and also why you shouldn’t do it. The curiosity of knowing what it is doing with its life does not let you think and you feel that you must know how your ex is doing after the relationship has ended.

Many reasons move you to think that if you really should text your ex but before doing so it is important that you recognize if these reasons are so true to do so or if you really should move the page and continue with your life.

Reasons why you want to text your ex

There are many reasons why a person, after having ended a relationship, wants to text its ex. The moment you start thinking, I should text my ex, you should ask what are the reasons why you want to do it. Some reasons why you have been thinking about texting your ex are:

  • You miss your ex and want to know if it feels the same as you.
  • Your friends insist that you should send a message to your ex.
  • You want me to give you explanations of why the relationship ended because you are not happy with the reasons your ex gave you to end the relationship
  • You want to make your life impossible since you know that your ex has a new relationship and sending a message is a way of damaging your current relationship.
  • You want to maintain a friendly relationship.
  • You failed in the relationship and want to apologize for what happened.

Some of the reasons outlined above may be one or more of the reasons why you think you think that if you should text your ex. Perhaps apart from these, you have other reasons, but these give you an idea where the situation is going.

When you have defined the reason why you want to text your ex, you must verify if this reason is valid or not, if it is necessary to do so. An example would be if you decide to text your ex because you want to explain why the relationship ended. At the moment the relationship ended, your ex told you the reasons why you wanted to end the relationship. These may not have been enough for you, but they were for your ex. If the relationship is over, it is not right to keep looking for explanations of why the relationship ended, you have to respect the decision that the other person made and leave it in the past. This should not be a reason why you think: should I text my ex?

Other reasons noted above are if you miss your ex and want to know if your ex feels the same as you. If the relationship ended on the part of your ex and after this, it has not written to you and has not called you, it is a way that it expresses that it does not miss you and that it feels comfortable with the decision is made. I know it may be difficult for you to accept the fact that your ex does not look for you and that it no longer wants to have a relationship, but sometimes it is better not to have this as one of the reasons why you think if you really should text your ex or not.

One of the reasons that could be valid when you think: should I text my ex? It’s if the relationship ended because you had a behaviour that hurt your former partner. Sometimes in relationships, people make mistakes that can hurt the other person. Maybe you saw yourself in a situation where you hurt someone or where they hurt you. If someone hurt you in a relationship, you expect that person to apologize and try to correct their mistake. If you were someone who hurt your ex-partner, you may think it’s time to apologize for what you did. Apologizing for a mistake is something right to do. Everyone has the right to change and repair the damage caused. Maybe you feel bad about how things ended and you don’t want to carry that feeling you caused in the other person.

If you think about what you should text your ex to maintain a relationship, here you must be careful. It is not bad to maintain a friendship with a person, but the reasons for maintaining a friendship must be clear. For example, you may not want a friendship with your ex as a way to spend time with that person and think that the relationship can return. There are times when these things work, but in many cases, they do not and for your emotional well-being it is not good for you to get your hopes up that friendship can bring reconciliation. If you want to make a healthy friendship with your ex, without any illusions about returning, this is not a bad idea. If you both agree that you can have a sincere friendship and bury those feelings of the past, it is perfect. But you should also understand that, even if you wish to have a friendship with your ex, it is possible that your ex feels that it is not necessary to maintain a friendship and this is something you must respect.

Some of the detailed reasons here will serve as a guide and give you an idea that if you really should text your ex or not. Remember that some of the reasons you have can lead you to ultimately suffer in all this.

After all, should I text my ex?

You got to the point where you start thinking, should I text my ex?, analyze the reasons that move you and in the end, you want the answer to the question: should I text my ex?

As we detailed above, when texting your ex you must look for the reasons that motivate you to do so. You have already read some of the reasons that may lead you to think about whether you should do it and the possible result that can come out of all this.

If the relationship ended and your ex explained the reasons why it wanted to end and after they finished it has not written or called you, the best thing you can do is not send any text message. Your ex was clear throughout the process, it did not leave an open window on the possibility of returning or establishing a friendship and you should understand this. You must respect your ex’s decision and continue with your life without thinking about whether you should text him/her or not.

What were the reasons why the relationship ended, the right thing would not be to text your ex unless you have done something wrong and decide to apologize. Apologizing does not have to have another hidden motive, but as a person you are it is correct to apologize for any mistake you have made. Smart people recognize their mistakes and correct them.

If it’s just a matter of apologizing for something bad you’ve done and then continuing with your life, it’s right to text your ex. But if you have other reasons that go further, it is best not to. It is better to accept how things went. Remember the beauty of the relationship and do not cling to silly ideas that can lead you to suffer more than when the relationship ended.

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What we recommend for Relationship issues

Professional relationship counselling

If you are suffering from relationship issues then ongoing professional relationship counselling could be what you need. Relationship Counselling can be done individually or with one or more partners.

Relationship counselling helps you regain the amazing elements of your relationship and provides you with the techniques needed to avoid conflicts, misunderstandings and the most common issues most relationships struggle with.

FAQs about should I text my ex?

Should I text my ex if is its birthday?

If the relationship ended cordially and you both agree to maintain a friendship, sending a message to your ex for its birthday is not bad.

I want to go back to my ex, but it doesn’t want to, what can I do?

If your ex does not want to return the best thing you can do is accept things as they are. You cannot force a person to be in a place where a person does not want to be.

My ex has a new relationship, but I want to talk to him/her, what can I do?

You should investigate the reasons why you want to talk to your ex. If you want to go back to your ex, but you know it has a partner, this would not be right. You have to respect your ex and its new partner. Now, if you want to talk to your ex because of something urgent that you know is the only person you can turn to, you can send a message explaining in detail the reason why you are writing.

My ex sent me a message, should I text my ex back?

The message must be answered according to what your ex wrote to you. If it sent you a message wanting to recover the relationship, but you do not want to return, you can explain that you do not want or simply do not respond. But if you only wrote a message to say hello and this does not cause you discomfort, you can respond and if you do not feel comfortable then do not respond.

My friends tell me that I should text my ex, should I text my ex?

The reasons why you want to text your ex should be yours and not mediated by what others tell you. You should not let yourself be influenced by what other people tell you in situations like these. You can hear the reasons why they want you to send a message to your ex, but if you don’t feel comfortable with these reasons, it is better not to do so.


The idea of should I text my ex can often appear after the relationship ends, but that does not mean that you really should. When thinking about wanting to text your ex, you should analyze the reasons why you want to do it and see if these reasons are clear and if in the end, it is worth it. If the relationship is over and everyone continues with their life, it is better not to send a message and continue with your life. If your ex and you decide to maintain a friendship there are no problems in sending a message, as long as they respect the limits.

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