My Past Haunts Me: How to deal (11 easy techniques)
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OptimistMinds
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In this guide, we will talk about 11 easy techniques you can use to deal with situations where “My past haunts me.”
We all make mistakes in our past and sometimes the past comes back to haunt us in a manner that is undesirable and nerve-wracking. But it does not have to be like that if we are successfully able to deal with our past problems.
My Past Haunts Me: How to deal
In case your past haunts you, here are 11 easy techniques you can use to deal with your past:
- Do away with the reminders
- Avoid the people online too
- Make peace with your past
- Focus your attention on something constructive
- Start living in the present
- Change the past by working on it now
- Realize that you are a changed person now
- Be open to new experiences
- Accept failure and learn from it
- Introspect what you need to let go of the past
- Give yourself time
Do away with the reminders
There are events or things that keep reminding us of our past problems and mistakes. They act as constant reminders of what happened in the past. In case you experience feeling like ‘my past haunts me’ look for what object or instance is triggering that thought. What part of your daily day-to-day life situation is making you feel that. Sometimes we have very strong reminders associated with the city we live in, to small reminders like a shirt. You can do away with these reminders by limiting your interaction with them. You can try your best to ignore these triggers until you can healthily deal with your past.
Avoid the people online too
Sometimes our reminders from the past are not things or objects but certain people. It could be your ex or simply your old school friend. This person reminds you of your past and seeing their face or hearing their name is enough for all the memories of your past back in your mind. Notice when a face makes you feel like ‘my past haunts me’ or is haunting you, try and avoid them. Not just in real life, but online also. Ignoring them in real life is easy at times especially if you both live in different cities, but due to social networking sites, you tend to scroll through their feed. Ignore them on social media too to the best of your capabilities.
Make peace with your past
Once you have successfully put your reminders of the past to rest, it is time to start making peace with your past. You need to accept the full reality of what happened to make the thought ‘my past haunts me’ not trouble you anymore. You can not select parts of your history and ignore the rest. You need to accept the full picture to be able to make peace with it. The most important step in this is to understand that the past can not be undone, changed, or altered. But what can be done is for us to not let it affect us and torment us.
Focus your attention on something constructive
You need to focus your attention from your past on something constructive in the present. Our brain has a limited capacity it can work on, so for our brain to be able to function well we need to put it to proper use. In case we wish to get rid of the thought that ‘my past haunts me,’ we need to divert our mind onto something productive. We need to channel the pain and the torment our past is causing us into fuel that pushes us to move forward and do something constructive. Many people turn to poetry, writing novels, or painting as a way to channel their past into something positive and post them on different sites online.
Start living in the present
Our past makes us live in those memories and hinders our experience of the present. We need to start living in the present if we wish to do away with the thought that ‘my past haunts me.’ So how do we start living in the present? It is an easy thing to say, but implementing it not so much. To start living in the present truly, one needs to notice the events that are happening right now. We need to use all our 5 senses to gather knowledge about the activities taking place right now. I could be simply noticing a new flower growing on the path to work, to noticing if an event is being held in your city that would interest you.
Change the past by working on it now
What has happened in your past has happened and nothing can be done about it, what we can change is how we react and handle it now. So we can start working on our past now, it is never too late to do it. Especially if you still feel like ‘my past haunts me.’ You can change your past by apologizing to the people you might have hurt and by forgiving those who hurt you. You need to forgive them even if they do not apologize to you, cause you are doing this for your peace of mind, not theirs. We need peace not them, so we need to apologize and forgive people from our past.
Realize that you are a changed person now
You are not the same person you were back then and you need to realize that. With age, we mature and see things more clearly than we could back then. We need to use this maturity to help get rid of thoughts like ‘my past haunts me.’ We as humans develop and get wiser as we move ahead in life. Feelings of we could not have done anything then, do not mean that you can not do anything now. We need to use our wisdom to understand how to deal and be at peace with our past. We are not the same person who was there back then, and that means that we will not do the same as we did before. Sometimes accepting that we have grown from our mistakes can help us deal with our past.
Be open to new experiences
The past has occurred and now we are in the present. To be able to not feel like ‘my past haunts me’ we need to be open to new experiences and create new memories. New and happier memories will let us experience joy and as they are formed the old ones fade away. We need to be open to what life throws at us and to be able to accept changes that come our way. We can let ourselves be open to the possibilities of a new future rather than closing us with the thoughts and memories of our past.
Accept failure and learn from it
We failed in our past does not make us a failure, what makes us a failure is if we are unable to learn from it and repeat the same mistake again and again. Accept the fact that you made mistakes in your past, analyze where you went wrong, and make sure to not repeat the same mistakes in the future. Our past is our greatest teacher and not learning from it would be a shame. Once you have learned from your past, you will feel assured that you won’t make the same mistake and the past will not haunt you that much.
Introspect what you need to let go of the past
Letting go of the past does not mean forgetting everything that occurred and moving on. You need to introspect and see what negative connotations of the past were you holding onto that you need to let go of. You need to let go of the past by letting go of the negative emotions associated with your past.
Give yourself time
Time is the best healer in the world. There is no wound deep enough that time can not heal. You need to give yourself time to heal and recover. In case you feel ‘my past haunts me,’ remember that with time the thought will also go away. You need to accept that certain things are not in your hand and that you do not also continuously be responsible to control them.
In this guide, we talked about 11 easy techniques you can use to deal with situations where “My past haunts me.”
FAQs: My Past Haunts Me: How to deal
Will my past come back to haunt me?
If you do not deal with your past it will come back to haunt you. You need to work out a way to effectively deal with it and put it to rest for once and for all. There are different ways you roast can come and haunt you but rather than trying to avoid them, you need to confront them. If you are all the time focused on your past you will end up having a bad future too.
How do you stop letting your past haunt you?
To stop letting your past haunt you, you need to understand and start living in the present. You can no be thinking about your past all the time. You need to make room for new memories but that can only happen if you let go of the memories. You need to accept your failures and learn from the mistakes you have made in the past rather than letting them haunt you.
How do I fix my past mistakes?
The very first step to fix your past mistakes is to accept the mistake. Once you can understand what has happened, moving on becomes easier. You need to next take responsibility for committing the mistake and apologize to the people to whom you might have caused pain to. You need to then start working on yourself by altering your behavior and thoughts to not repeat the same past mistake you made.
Why does the past keep coming back?
The reason your past keeps coming back is that you haven’t moved forward and are still stuck on it. Your thoughts are still spiraling about what happened in the past and the memories keep coming back. You haven’t accepted and made apologies for your past and that is why it keeps coming back.
Can your past catch up with you?
Yes, your past can catch up with you and it will at some point in time. You can not outrun your past and until and unless you deal with your past, it will catch up with you and cause problems. It may make an entrance at the worst time possible and throw you off your track completely.
References
https://www.jimhjort.com/articles/three-things-you-can-do-to-stop-being-haunted-by-regret
https://vocal.media/humans/four-things-to-do-when-the-past-keeps-haunting-you
