My bipolar boyfriend broke up with me

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Page last updated: 15/04/2022

This article will explain how a person that had a relationship with a boyfriend with bipolar disorder can be affected by their mental condition. It will show what does it mean to be bipolar, and how it can impact the relationship.

Along with that, the article will explain how one can cope with that breakup, and understand that very little of it was connected to them.

Why did my bipolar boyfriend break up with me?

People with Bipolar disorder can have mood swings that have a great impact on their relationships. If your boyfriend happened to have bipolar disorder, some things need to be considered. The first one is if he is in treatment.

If he is, and he is taking proper care of himself, it might be that he decided to end the relationship based on what he felt. When a person has Bipolar disorder, even though they have some struggles, if they stick to their treatment, they can have a stable and regular life.

But if he is not in treatment, it might be that he is experiencing mood swings, which can cause them to act impulsively, and be more irritable. If that is the case, another thing to consider is if you have ever gone through this before.  

It might be that they have broken up with you before, and when they feel better, they come back. If that is the case, it is up to you to reflect on how you feel about being or not in a relationship with him, knowing that this might become a pattern. 

But for you to understand a little more about what they might be going through, so you can be better informed on how to deal with this relationship or the end of it, let’s take a look at what it means to have Bipolar disorder. 

What is Bipolar disorder?

Bipolar disorder is a mental health condition that is characterized by frequent mood swings. I can make a person go from a depressive episode to manic behavior, in which they can make impulsive and risky behaviors. 

It is a condition that doesn’t have a cure, but it can be managed. Through treatment, the symptoms can get better and people can have a good quality of life. It is not a rare condition, it affects around 3% of the American population. 

Bipolar disorder is divided into three types. Bipolar I, Bipolar II, and Cyclothymia. What will define what type of Bipolar disorder a person has is the frequency of their depressive and manic episodes, as well as the intensity of other symptoms. 

But what is important to know is that when people are in their mania state, they tend to rush into things, be impulsive, and sometimes even put themselves in risky behaviors. This can mean that they can go gambling, have unprotected sex, or go on shopping sprees.

When they are in a depressive state, they can lose their energy, feel intense sadness, and lack hope. Along with guilt, change in sleeping and eating patterns, thoughts of death and suicide, and difficulty focusing. 

How can be Bipolar affect a romantic relationship?

Being in a relationship with a person with bipolar disorder can feel like being on a roller-coaster. Their mood swings can be hard to understand, and not taking it personally might take a lot of effort. 

But along with that, it is important to understand that this doesn’t define your partner or the relationship you have. Even though it may present some difficult times, being with a person with bipolar disorder can have its upsides. 

They are usually very creative people that are full of energy sometimes. But because of their mood swings, they can make impulsive and rash decisions such as ending the relationship. 

When that happens, it might be hard to not take it personally. But it is important to understand that if they are behaving like that, or have abandoned treatment, the relationship could turn into something difficult for you. 

It could be that you need to become their caregiver, or experience burnout because you were constantly answering to their needs. With time, the relationship could get to a point where you would realize you were putting his care in front of your life goals and values.

How can I cope with my breakup?

When a person breaks up with us it might be extremely hard to understand why and to go back to your life without this person. When this happens, you should allow your emotions to come out.

Don’t try to avoid the pan. Let it flow through you, embrace it, and little by little you will regain control of it. Going through a break is a grieving process. It will have its ups and downs. You will need to take your life back, and not be a part of that “we” identity. 

That can take some time. Through that try to focus on reconnecting with your individuality. Do things you love, be in places with people that love you, and try to discover new passions. All of that can help you be more in touch with yourself.

As said, when a person with Bipolar disorder breaks up with you, it might not mean that the problem was all in the relationship. Sometimes they were also going through things on their own, so try to not devalue yourself, and keep an open mind to what is to come in your life ahead. 

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ): Why did my bipolar boyfriend break up with me?

Do boyfriends with Bipolar disorder usually come back?

Yes, boyfriends with Bipolar disorder can come back after they have been through the manic episode. But they usually just state that they made the wrong decision and might do very little to try and fix the relationship.

It happens in that way because, after the manic episode, they are usually in a depressive mood, causing them to have little energy to work on the relationship. If you have noticed that this is a pattern that is going on with you, try to think about your emotional health and well-being.

Think of how it feels for you to be repeating those patterns, how and if you think they might change, and what are your boundaries when dealing with this. This is not saying you should break up with them, or not take them back, but rather for you to be in touch with your emotions and not prioritize others’ well-being over yours. 

Why do people with Bipolar disorder push away their partners?

They can push people away because they feel like they might not be good enough. This can make them isolate themselves, not allow their partners to be close, or even help them through the process.

Another thing that can make people with Bipolar disorder end a relationship is their need for routine. As part of their treatment and well-being, they might need to set a strict routine of work, exercising, sleeping schedule, and so on. 

If they are in a relationship with someone that doesn’t understand or support that, it can be hard to go on. Not only that, having to make the other person live by their schedule, can make them feel guilty. 

Aside from that, the mood swings that a person with Bipolar disorder can go through might cause them to end a relationship for a period or good. 

Can a breakup trigger a person with Bipolar disorder?

Yes, going through a breakup or an intense argument can trigger a person with Bipolar disorder. They might have difficulty processing the emotions brought on by the situation. 

If that is your case, try to get in touch with the professional that looks after you, maybe to deal with what is going on, be it an argument or a breakup. They can help you through therapy to manage your symptoms and keep your mood as stable as possible.

Can I get married to someone with Bipolar disorder?

When asking if you should marry someone with Bipolar disorder you should consider how the relationship has been so far. If it has been a somewhat stable relationship, in which your partner seems to take care of themselves and the relationship, it might be okay to be in a marriage with them.

On the other hand, if it seems to you like they are not keeping to the treatment, and they show erratic behavior, mood swings, or irritability, it might be important to consider if you would like to deal with this situation in your lifetime.  

Instead of just jumping out of the relationship, it might be good to have a conversation with them to understand if they are open to treatment or not. Through this conversation, it can become clear to you what to expect from the relationship.

Can Bipolar disorder get worse as people get older?

Bipolar disorder can get worse in people as they age, even more, when the person doesn’t stay in treatment. If that is the case, they might experience more and more intense symptoms as time goes by.

The treatment of Bipolar disorder usually takes time and is constant. They should start treatment as soon as the first symptoms appear, this can help them learn to navigate this condition better.

How can I calm a manic person?

When a person is in a manic period, some things can be done to help them feel more stable. Having a stable sleeping pattern can help improve their mood, and when they don’t sleep well it can cause their symptoms to be worse.

The same can be said about having a daily routine. They also benefit from having realistic goals to accomplish. It can help them manage their illness better, and not feel so frustrated and disappointed in themselves. 

If a person uses alcohol or drugs, their symptoms tend to get worse, so it would be good for them to avoid it. Having your friends and loved ones close is a good idea. You might set a plan of action with them, so they can help if your mood changes to try and keep you safe.

Aside from that, keeping your treatment and living a less stressful life can help you improve your quality of life. Although work and study are important, it is good to keep in perspective that your well-being is even more important.

Conclusions 

This article explained what bipolar disorder is and what happens to a bipolar person causes them to be unstable in relationships. Through that, it showed why they might have broken up with people they had relationships with. 

Along with that, the article explained are ways a person that got broken up with can cope with the end of the relationship.

If you have any questions or comments about this article, feel free to write it in the section below.

References

https://www.justanswer.com/mental-health/6cph8-bipolar-boyfriend-broke-days-ago-says.html
https://www.healthline.com/health/bipolar-disorder/partner-break-up#unhealthy-signs

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