Marriage Counseling Questions (59+)

To make the most of your marriage counseling sessions, it may be helpful to have questions prepared to ask your spouse when the time comes.

Having a qualified counselor present will make it easier for both of you to be more transparent about how you feel, and it will also have a mediator to help you through a dispute that might arise.

The more answers you get, the better you will be able to communicate with your spouse in the future.

This blog mentions marriage counseling questions for you.

Marriage Counseling Questions

Here are some questions about marital counseling that your partner may ask during your therapy sessions. 

  1. What is the biggest problem of our marriage? 
  2. When did the problems begin? 
  3. How am I going to do that gets on your nerves? 
  4. What do you appreciate about me the most? 
  5. You believe me, huh? 
  6. How did you get to Marriage Counseling? 
  7. How can I do to better our marriage? 
  8. Are you sexually satisfied? 
  9. Where are you going to see our marriage in “X” years? 
  10. Do you realize how much I appreciate you and admire you?
  11. You want a divorce, huh? 
  12. Are we going through the wrong phase? 
  13. How do you really feel about the relationship? 
  14. What the hell are you curious about me? 
  15. Which kind of love are you feeling? 
  16. You believe me, sure? 
  17. How can I win back your trust? 
  18. Are you seeing a new person?
  19. Have you ever thought of having an affair? 
  20. What are the reasons you want to do things? 
  21. Do you believe as you can connect with me? 
  22. Do you feel welcomed for that? 
  23. Why are you seeing the future?
  24. Were you ready to adjust the way you make improvements? 
  25. Is there anything with which you feel you can’t trust me? 
  26. Do you ever felt the need to search my phone if I left it unattended? 
  27. Have I ever done anything to lose your faith in you? 
  28. If you don’t trust me anymore, what are the steps I should take to regain your faith? 
  29. What makes you the happiest man?
  30. What was the finest period of time in our marriage, and what did you relish the most? 
  31. Is there anything I do that’s going to drag you down? 
  32. Can you know that I care about your happiness? 
  33. What can I do to share your happiness with you? 
  34. Will I have to stress you out? 
  35. What do you think is the most stressful? 
  36. Do you feel that after a stressful day you can come home to me and feel good? 
  37. What are some ways I can help you feel more at ease during a stressful time? 
  38. What do you think are the biggest stressors in our marriage? 
  39. Was there something that has happened between us in the past that still worries you? 
  40. Only one thing in the past could change, what would that be?
  41. Can you agree that our relationship was mostly good, mostly evil, or somewhere in between? 
  42. Were there any issues in the past that you believe have not been resolved? 
  43. What kind of sweet memories do you have of our past? 
  44. Would you like to live married? 
  45. Where do you want to see us a year from now? 
  46. Where do you want to see us five years from now? 
  47. What targets would you want us to accomplish together? 
  48. Would you explain what you expect our lives to be like in the future? 
  49. What’s the one thing you’ve always loved about me?
  50. If we could have a trip together, with me and you, where would you like to go? 
  51. What do I do that makes you smile? 
  52. What is your most cherished memory of us? 
  53. What’s wrong with our marriage that you wouldn’t change for anything? 
  54. Who’s going to be affected by decisions about our marriage? 
  55. How are our finances going? 
  56. These are the good aspects of our marriage? 
  57. How long have we been able to work on our marriage? 
  58. Can we make our marriage a top priority? 
  59. What’s the biggest improvement in our relationship? 
  60. Do we have a good marriage counselor?

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What do You Need to Do to Succeed in Marriage Counseling?

The most critical part of your therapy is to be able to respond frankly to all of these same therapy questions.

If you treat this as something of an Inquisition with your spouse being grilled with all these questions, you may as well not waste your time. 

There are times when people turn up for help when what they really want to do is threaten their partner.

They ‘re not interested in getting things figured out; they ‘re just looking for a psychologist to pick sides and test their viewpoint. A great advisor does not take sides, but stay neutral.

If you get married advice, you need to be able to open up.

It’s going to hurt, but it’s the only way you’re going to get the most out of all this work. Your partner would not place his heart on the table until you do so. 

It might also be beneficial, if you’re on good terms with your partner, to answer these questions ahead of time.

We, like you, will choose what they want to say. 

In addition to it, be very careful not to write a speech that goes with each question. This isn’t a rehearsal; it’s advice.

At the moment, you need to talk so that your feelings are genuine and truthful.

The following is a list of some books and tools on marriage therapy and building relationships. These books are a great source of knowledge.

All of these books are easily available on the Amazon Store.

Just click the book you wish to study and you will be redirected to the page from where you can access it.

  • Couples Therapy Workbook: 30 Guided Conversations to Re-Connect Relationships by Kathleen Mates-Youngman  | Oct 6, 2014
  • Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts Workbook for Women Updated: Seven Questions to Ask Before—and After—You Marry by Les Parrott and Leslie Parrott  | Nov 24, 2015
  • I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships by Michael S. Sorensen and Autumn Creek Press
  • The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God by Timothy Keller and Kathy Keller | Nov 5, 2013
  • The Marriage Counseling Workbook: 8 Steps to a Strong and Lasting Relationship by Emily Cook Ph.D. LCMFT  | Mar 13, 2018

What we recommend for Counselling

Professional counselling

If you are suffering from depression or any other mental disorders then ongoing professional counselling could be your ideal first point of call. Counselling will utilize theories such as Cognitive behavioural therapy which will help you live a more fulfilling life.

What questions are asked in marriage counseling?

Here are a few questions regarding marriage counseling to ask your spouse during therapy sessions. 

  • In our marriage, what are the greatest issues? 
  • When did these problems originate? 
  • What do I do that annoys you? 
  • What do you really love about me? 
  • Are you able to trust me?

What a marriage counselor should not say?

The marriage counselor must not say the following things:

  • I don’t have any business giving advice about the relationship
  • You could not make it
  • I like your companion better than you do 
  • I am bringing my own luggage
  • You can hold everything that you do about you (in the case of divorce) 
  • You would have always come to me before tieing the knot.

How can I do marriage counseling at home?

Marriage counseling can be done at home in the following ways:

  1.  Make a list of enjoyable stuff to plan to do together 
  2. All arguments need to be resolved before you go to bed
  3. Have an ‘Honesty Hour’ at least once a month (at least once in a week)   
  4. Plan a special night-date each week 
  5. Unplug Yourself For One Day  
  6. Leave it till Sunday”

What does marriage counseling consist of?

Marriage counseling, also known as marriage therapy, helps people — dating or not — recognize and settle disputes, and strengthen partnerships. Marriage counseling provides couples with the tools to better communicate, negotiate differences, solve problems, and even argue in a healthier manner.

Do marriage counselors ever recommend divorce?

Psychology is focused on the assumption that an individual is and ought to be in control of their own lives and decisions.

So the counselor will not really suggest divorce even in cases where it is more than obvious that a couple has hit a hard wall. 

How to behave with marriage counselors?

  1. In addition to your relationship, plan to focus on yourself
  2. Try to remember it’s not always a fair process
  3. Be truthful
  4. Exchange the feelings among others you know
  5. Prefer counseling
  6. Understand that there is a cyclical dimension to the issues

This page provided you with some of the most effective marriage counseling questions.

If you have any questions or queries regarding this blog, let us know through your comments. We will be glad to assist you.


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