I want to die but I’m not suicidal (What to do)

You may want to die and for everything to end but not be suicidal, then here are some things you can do when you feel like that. 

The sum of your life is minimized to a single thought: I want to die. Often it’s not that you want to die, but you don’t want to endure the pain of living anymore. Your mind can be dominated at its lowest, with disillusioning thoughts that keep you from feeling optimistic. It looks like a black hole, but that isn’t the case. These thoughts create a picture of a tunnel. Your vision has blind spots and you can only see what is right in front of you: pain.

There were plenty of people. You’re not alone, and the moment of absolute despair is going to pass. It might sound like there are no other choices for you, but you do. When you have tunnel vision, you actually can’t see them. You’re not going to be cured of your mental health problems, but that’s one moment you can live. You need to take life hour by hour some days, even minute by minute before you can make progress again in recovery. When these thoughts come up, keeping yourself safe before the pain disappears is your only duty.

You might be depressed

Depression causes individuals to dwell solely on shortcomings and grievances, to stress the negative side of their conditions, and to downplay their capabilities or importance. Someone with severe depression can’t see the possibility of a good outcome and may believe they will never be happy or things will never go right for them again.

Depression affects the thoughts of a person in such a way that the individual does not see whether it is possible to solve a problem. It’s as if depression puts a filter on the thought of the person that distorts things. This is why depressed people do not know that dying, in the same way, that other people do, is a permanent solution to a temporary issue. A teen with depression may feel like there is no other way out of trouble, no other way out of emotional pain, or no other way to express a hopeless misfortune.

People who feel like dying may not even know they’re depressed often. They don’t realize that it’s the depression, not the situation, that affects them to see things in a way like “there’s no way out,” “it will never get better,” “there’s nothing I can do”

The skewed thought is cleared when depression lifts and someone receives the right therapy or care. The person will once again find pleasure, energy, and hope. But if someone is severely depressed, a real risk is death thought.

People with a condition called bipolar disorder are often at greater risk of dying because their condition can cause them to go through periods of severe depression as well as times of abnormally high or frenzied activity (called mania). Both of these extreme stages of bipolar disorder influence the mood, outlook, and judgment of an individual and distort them. It may be a challenge for individuals with this disorder to keep concerns in perspective and behave with good judgment.

Warning signs that you feel like “I want to die but I’m not suicidal”

People who commit suicide have no desire to die, but to put an end to their suffering. Don’t just condemn their talk of dying as a threat. Get assistance if you notice any hints that they might be thinking about hurting themselves.

Here are some of the warning signs when you might feel  “I want to die, but I’m not suicidal”:

  • Concentrates on death
  • Creates plans to say bye
  • Withdrawn from others
  • Shows despair
  • Shows mood swings and signs of disturbed sleep
  • They drink with medications
  • Act recklessly

Concentrates on death

Many individuals speak freely about wanting to die or commit suicide. Or they focus on the issue of dying and death. They can investigate ways to kill themselves or purchase a firearm, knife, or pills.

Creates plans to say bye

The person can take actions, such as updating a will, giving away objects, and saying goodbye to others, to prepare for death. A dying note can be written by others.

Withdrawn from others

The person avoids close friends and family, loses interest in social events and activities, and becomes alienated.

Shows despair 

The person can speak freely of intolerable pain, or feel like they are a burden on others.

Shows mood swings and signs of disturbed sleep 

The person can frequently be depressed, anxious, sad, or angry. They can also be very aggressive, moody, or irritable. But once they’ve agreed to go through with dying, they will instantly become calm. They can then have a lot more or a lot less sleep than normal.

They drink or take drugs 

Misuse of drugs increases the risk of dying. It may be an attempt to dull the pain or to damage oneself by using a lot of drugs and alcohol.

Acts recklessly

The person can take dangerous opportunities, such as driving drunk or having risky sex.

Individuals may also be at risk if they have:

  • Mental disruptions
  • Alcohol or other prescription addictions
  • A severe physical condition
  • A big loss (such as the death of a loved one or the loss of a relationship or job)
  • Severe legal or financial difficulties
  • A trauma or violence history

Passive warning signs when you feel “I want to die, but I’m not suicidal”

Passive dying ideation requires worrying to a marked degree about death. These thoughts may take the form of imagining yourself dead or wishing you were dead. 3 While passive suicidal ideation may be regular, severe, and intrusive, in response to these thoughts, you do not take action or make plans to harm yourself.

Passive dying ideation may provide examples of:

  • To imagine yourself lying in a casket
  • Only imagines what will happen at their funeral
  • Obsessing or thinking about what you leave in your will for people (though not taking any action, such as filling out paperwork)
  • Wishing to die in your sleep or a car crash

Without needing to act on them, you can have these thoughts. For example, you might be deterred from making dying plans by your family, job commitments, or your religious/philosophical beliefs.

What to do when you feel “I want to die but I’m not suicidal”

To keep yourself safe, there are a few things you can do. Put some space between your thoughts and actions and speak to someone about how you feel (whether it is a friend, parent, or counselor). If you request help, you may feel like you are a burden to others. You may not have the motivation to ask, but it will help you get out of your mind and maybe find a way to help you cope better by talking about what you feel.

It’s important to know when you start to feel bad so that before they get worse, you can fix those feelings. Before these dark thoughts arise, be diligent, and build a safety plan. Determine an activity that makes you feel comfortable, and decide who you can call a person you trust. If necessary, provide your counselor or therapist’s contact information.

Here are some techniques one can use to help with the feeling of “I want to die, but I’m not suicidal”:

  • Develop a plan for protection
  • Seek early support
  • For 24 hours, postpone any decision to end your life 
  • Stop being by yourself (especially at night) 
  • Stop drinking with medications 
  • Write down how you feel
  • Challenge your ideas 
  • Remind yourself of the reasons for living 
  • Speak to a person who can help 
  • Set small targets for yourself 

Develop a plan for protection 

When they come up, someone who has had dying thoughts in the past or who is going through a difficult time can prepare accordingly on how they can handle dying thoughts. There are applications to help you make a safety plan, or you can talk to a specialist in mental health.

Seek early support 

Talk to somebody about how you’re feeling; it can be a safe place to start with a family member, acquaintance, local doctor, or support service. If it seems people are not listening, until someone does, keep asking for help.

For 24 hours, postpone any decision to end your life 

Use this time to chat with someone you trust.

Stop being by yourself (especially at night) 

Stay with a member of your family or friend, or have someone stay with you until your dying thoughts decrease. Chat with a service online or use one of the 24-hour crisis centers if someone you trust can’t be there. You don’t have to go alone through this.

Stop drinking with medications 

Most medications will make you feel even worse. They’re not going to fix your issues and might even make you do stuff you wouldn’t usually do.

Write down how you feel 

It can sometimes help you to understand yourself better and find potential solutions by writing a journal, novel, song lyrics, or poem.

Challenge your ideas 

Remind yourself that dying thoughts come and go, just like other thoughts, and thinking about something does not mean you have to act. Don’t tolerate thoughts for what they are; seek ways to challenge them. If anyone experiences dying thoughts, they can truly believe like without them, no one cares, or that others will be better off. This is never true—what would you think if you were told that by a friend?

Remind yourself of the reasons for living 

Write down what is stopping you from acting on thoughts of dying. Remind yourself that there are things that are important to you and that you still want to do, even if things might seem hopeless.

Speak to a person who can help 

To assist with the urgent situation and to help you find other, longer-term resources, call a crisis line. You may also make an appointment with the doctor or a mental health provider to meet with them.

Set small targets for yourself 

Try to set objectives that will encourage you to feel in control and help you move forward. Write them down and when you’ve completed them, tick them off.

These are just suggestions. When you feel this way, it can feel difficult to claw your way out. What you encounter, however, is true and not anything to be taken lightly. Speak to a mental health professional about recovery options, such as counseling or medication, if you often have these dark times.

In this guide, we discussed if you may want to die and for everything to end but not be suicidal, then what are some things you can do when you feel like that. 

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