In this article we will discuss what to do if you feel like there is no help for you.
We will also look at what could be causing you to feel hopeless about your mental health journey and what you can do about it.
Why do I feel like there is no help for me?
If you are feeling like there is no help for me, it could be that you are feeling hopeless and this hopelessness is a result of your circumstances in life and your own views about your capacity to handle these circumstances.
Some of the things you can do to help yourself cope include:
- Consider that your thoughts are irrational
- Get with the right people
- Get the right treat,et
- Find the right combination of changes and strategies
- Seek support
- Be patient
Hopelessness is also a symptom of depression that stems out of various issues and primarily it comes from negative beliefs that one creates about themselves, the world, and others based on prior life experiences.
Signs of hopelessness
If you are not sure what you are feeling when you say that there is no hope for yourself, it is time to consider what this pessimistic thought can indicate.
Take a moment to understand whether these thoughts stem from hopelessness and notice if these signs are something that you have been experiencing.
- losing interest in things you used to care about
- no motivation to do anything
- low self-esteem
- negative thinking about yourself and the future
- Social withdrawal
Cause of hopelessness
These thoughts about hopelessness or pessimistic ways of thinking are a result of maladaptive patterns of thought based on your beliefs about yourself and the world around you.
Many of these patterns are based on non-fact based evidence that leads to cognitive distortions. These distortions can impact your mood and your behaviour.
For example your thought pattern could look something like: if this therapy session doesn’t help me, nothing will. This type of thinking can stop you from considering other therapists or other forms of treatment and make you feel like there is something inherently wrong with you.
This form of cognitive distortion is called “All or nothing thinking”. Other forms of distortions that lead to feelings of hopelessness include:
- catastrophizing (everything will go wrong, it’s the end of the road).
- fortune telling (it will never get better, if I tried something bad would happen).
- labelling (I’m a loser, it’s a failure).
- discounting the positive (yes, I didn’t lose my job, but I’ll definitely be in the next round of cuts).
Thoughts such as these can be hard to control, are ways of thinking we’ve used for so long we don’t even know how to think differently, and/or are related to deep-seated issues.
Let us take a look at some common thoughts that are related to hopelessness with respect to your mental health progress.
Common thoughts related the thought that there is no help
- ‘None of the self-help strategies work for me’
Most mental health difficulties, especially the more severe ones, cannot be overcome with self-help strategies alone. They require professional treatments such as psychology sessions or medication.
It is also possible that most of the self-help strategies that you have tried do not apply to your unique context since what might work for others might not work for you.
- ‘I’ve tried getting professional help, and that doesn’t work’
Unfortunately, there are many mental health and medical professionals out there who won’t ‘get’ you and your circumstances. The differences in personality and cultures can become barriers to your treatment if they are not well-informed multiculturally.
It is unfortunate if you have come across doctors or therapists that do not suit you but that does not mean that therapy or medications as a whole will not work.
If you feel this way, you don’t have to stick with the same person or medication.
- ‘I’m tired of trying, and I want to give up’
You might be feeling like you don’t have the energy anymore to keep seeking help and trying to get better. A bit of open-mindedness and one more step could be all that’s needed. You’ve made it this far – why not give it one more try?
It could also do you good if you can take a look inward, and see what is causing the resistance, if there is any, and discuss it with your new therapist the next time you try.
What you can do
Here are somethings you can do to cope when you feel like there is no hope for you:
Consider That Your thoughts might be irrational
The hopelessness you feel could be because of the irrational thoughts discussed earlier. If you are in therapy, consider talking to your therapist about these feelings of hopelessness and dealing with it head on.
You can also take time to work out these thoughts on your own by reflecting on them A few things you can do is:
- Journal your thoughts and feelings
- Take time to consider these thoughts objectively
- Identify whether these thoughts are realistic or not
- Use evidence from your life what challenge these thoughts- For example, if you feel like therapy is not working, think about the times that it did work and how it help you overcome challenges then
- Remind yourself that these thoughts are fleeting and these challenges can be overcomed with the right tools.
- Take time to learn these tools like rationalising, thought record, challenging these thoughts.
The right people
Finding the right doctor and therapist is crucial to getting better. You might have to try a few doctors until you find one you like, trust and feel safe with.
The quality of the relationship between You and your therapist or doctor is going to have a huge impact on treatment success.
If you do not find your doctor to be someone you can approach easily or trust, it could be time to get a second opinion.
When it comes to a therapist, noticing any resistance and letting your therapist know is important as they might be able to help you overcome it or find someone who can help.
When you are seeking the right form of support you might want to consult with people you can relate to in terms of, for example, their culture, sexuality, gender, or other life experiences.
You can also consider seeking out support groups that are facilitated by a professional that can help you garner new perspectives on your journey.
The right treatment method
Seek out the right treatment for you. Take to your doctor if you find that the side effects of your drug are affecting your health and well-being. Some antidepressants can cause suicidal thoughts or can even impact your ability to feel.
Make sure you keep your doctors in the loop of these effects so that you can consider other drugs and dosages.
Similarly asking your therapist what form of treatment they plan to use with you and asking if you could try something else if it does not work can be something you can push yourself to do.
It takes courage to be an advocate for yourself and being honest about your treatment can make a huge difference.
Find the right combination
Research finds that the best way to tackle mental health disorders is a combination of drug treatment, therapy, and lifestyle changes.
Taking the time to understand what sort of combination of self help strategies, lifestyle changes, along with which drug and form of therapy works best for you.
Consulting with your doctor and therapist about your drug dose and your therapy process can be an important effort you can make for your healing.
Be open to mixing things as you make lifestyle changes like choosing to run instead of doing yoga or choosing to have therapy sessions in the morning instead of in the evenings if it helps you feel calmer.
Being able to express these needs to your therapist and taking stock of what combination works best for you is something you can apply yourself to.
See if you can get a friend, family member, youth worker or mentor to support you through your next attempt at getting some help.
It can make a huge difference if you have someone in your corner who encourages you, reminds you to keep trying, and holds you accountable for completing your therapy homework, refilling your prescriptions or meditating regularly.
Make sure the person who is willing to help you is informed about your issue and that they are educated about healthy boundaries and that you respect theirs too.
Many medications and therapies take a little while before you see change or an impact.
For example, antidepressant medication often takes 4–6 weeks to start easing the symptoms of depression.
Also, most psychological therapy programs are designed to be stretched across 8–20 sessions, or longer for some more complex conditions.
If you’re working hard to get better but aren’t feeling any different, it’s important to remember that it’s not your fault.
Make an effort to be patient with yourself because mental health problems are deep seated and it takes time to make changes and accept these changes.
If what you’ve been doing hasn’t been working, it sounds like it’s time to try a different approach: get a second opinion from a new doctor or a new therapist.
In this article, we have discussed possible reasons why you could be feeling like there is no hope for you and some common thoughts that signal hopelessness or pessimism about your mental health journey.
We have also explored some things you can do to help cope with these pessimistic thoughts and how to help yourself grow.
Frequently asked questions related to “I feel like there is no help for me”
How do you figure out what’s wrong with me mentally?
The best way to figure out what is wrong with you mentally is to consult with a professional- a physician or a psychologist can help you understand what could be an issue with your physiology that might be causing mental health distress or a therapist that can help you make sense of the thought and emotional patterns that is affecting you mentally.
Why do I feel like I have a mental disorder?
If the stressors in your life are causing immense emotional distress to the point that you are unable to sleep, eat, work, and maintain relationships, it is advisable to consult with a medical professional or mental health professional about your well-being.
Stressful events such as losing a job, relationship issues, bereavement or money issues can lead to mental illness.
Is apathy a form of depression?
Apathy is not the same as depression, although apathy can be a symptom of depression. It can make you feel like you do not care about anything in particular.
Depression may cause you to become emotionally numb and hopeless about the things in your life including not feeling excited about people and things that you once were interested in.
Why do I always think something is wrong with me?
If you are continuously bothered by the thought that you have a physical illness or something is wrong with you physically it could be pointing towards anxiety.
Illness anxiety disorder, sometimes called hypochondriasis or health anxiety, is worrying excessively that you are or may become seriously ill even without any signs of symptoms.
Is feeling crazy normal?
If you are feeling like you are “going crazy”, it could truly stem from a developing mental illness because it is not normal to feel out of touch with reality.
If you feel like you are unable to cope and make sense of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours it could be time to visit a mental health professional since it is not a normal thing you experience.