In this article, we explore the feeling of not being able to do anything right. Why do you feel this way? How can you make it right? What positive words do you need when you feel this way? These questions will be answered below.
Why can’t I do anything right?
“If you’re working on low self-esteem, you could be questioning yourself, “Why can’t I get anything right? It is essential for you to realize that it is not your responsibility that you feel unmotivated. Our psychological realms can be complicated. We also go through depressive periods that feel mysterious and difficult to resolve. Then, we feel good again from nowhere.
A significant sources of this question is low self-esteem—more than others pointing out your flaws, when you criticize yourself, it’s more dangerous.
Critical Inner Voice leads to a negative view of self. Creating a negative self-perception may have profound implications. For instance, if someone thinks they don’t like specific individuals, they are much more inclined to prevent encounters with others and are faster to respond defensively, disingenuously, or even react negatively. The essence and extent to which we communicate with everyone, irrespective of their precision, is highly influenced by these perceived identities.
Additionally, one of the most significant pillars on which our interpersonal conduct stands is our perceived selves. Besides, when we view ourselves critically if we classify ourselves as unpleasant, unattractive, rude, timid, etc., it becomes even tougher to fathom that someone might see us in a positive manner.
Why do I feel this way?
Critical Inner Voice
A well-weaved pattern of negative thoughts against ourselves and others is the vital internal voice. Most of our self-destructive and inappropriate conduct is at the origin of the pestering “voices,” or feelings that cover this internalized discourse.
An auditory hallucination is not the vital internal voice; it is perceived as thoughts inside your mind. This flow of negative thoughts creates an anti-self that prevents people from behaving in their best interest.
The vital internal voice is an internal threat that can impact any aspect of life, like our self-esteem and trust, our private and intimate relations, and our school and work success and achievements. By damaging our optimistic feelings towards ourselves and others and promoting self-criticism, interiority, mistrust, self-denial, addiction problems, and a withdrawal from goal-directed behaviors, these negative emotions influence us.
Typically, these inner thoughts emerge from childhood experiences that are internalized and interpreted as forms in which we think of ourselves. Many of these opposing voices also appear from our parents or primary caregivers as kids. We carry on the negative views parents have, not only about their kids but also against themselves. Our voices may also originate from relationships or authoritative adults with friends and siblings.
Many individuals believe they would lose contact with their conscience if they avoid listening to their vital internal voice. The critical internal voice, however, more like conscience, is not a reliable source of morality. On the opposite, insulting and humiliating is the vital inner voice and sometimes pushes us to make highly misleading decisions.
Without encouraging us to alter unwanted characteristics or behave positively, these critical voices appear to raise our self-hatred feelings.
It’s easy to persuade yourself that you’re the only one who feels like nothing will ever be done right. You unfavorably associate yourself with almost everyone you can think of. Conclude: They’ve got priorities sorted, speeding through at the top of their game, winning left, right, and center achievements, and almost all under the order. Your interpretation is inaccurate!
At one point or another, the truth is that everybody gets burdened with disappointment at their shortcomings, actual or perceived.
Did someone say these words to you?
Has your partner ever mentioned to you how “You can’t do anything right”? How much does this occur? If your partner does that very frequently, then odds are you are in an unhealthy relationship.
One of the cornerstones of the psychology of violence is that victims believe that they can’t do something right. This mentality is ingrained externally into them, but they assume responsibility for it, thinking that they might eventually change the scenario by changing their concepts, emotions, or actions.
Even after the scenario gets excruciatingly horrible, and often not even then, victims will not actively label it as ‘abuse’ to what’s occurring to them. They will genuinely think that they’re the only ones with the issue, that they are the ones at fault, that they are the ones who do not conform, that they are the ones who say, do, believe, or feel bad things.
A primary way offenders achieve this goal is by using selection bias knowingly or implicitly. All cases of their victims performing commendable things are overlooked or diminished while emphasizing all their victims’ incidents performing actions that credibly warrant scrutiny or liability. We are all individuals, and over the entire life course, we all execute numerous actions from both groups.
In times of negative thoughts, feelings, and actions, even the finest among us lose sight, and even the worst among us spring up with positive thoughts, feelings, and acts on occasions. So for perpetrators, it’s merely a matter of concentrating all the emphasis on what their targets are doing incorrectly and not paying much attention to what their victims are doing good over the weeks, months, or even years before the victims themselves begin to accept this preconceived narrative, a tale where they’re imperfect, evil, worthless.
Another way perpetrators achieve the aim of making their victims believe they can’t do something right is by ingraining conflicting signals about acceptable habits, a kind of curse if you do curse if you don’t the situation. The victims laugh too much one day and don’t laugh the next day sufficiently. They’re quite stubborn one day, they’re too modest the next. They are also communicative one day and too reserved the next day.
Not only can abusers build confusion with the above tactics and many more like them to retain power, which is what all violence is about, but they often shift the blame for what is happening wrong in the relationship away from themselves and onto their victims. These victims lack the requisite insight to acknowledge pointing fingers where most of the issues originate, which would be with the violence itself and the offender handing it out.
Words you need to hear when you feel this way.
It’s tough becoming an adult. It is stressful to try to achieve anything. Take some deep breaths. Being your greatest, the worse critic, it’s too natural to believe that what you’re doing is not perfect. To equate yourself and set yourself low to someone else before you can even think of getting yourself up.
It seems like often you don’t relate your successes to the failures of other individuals.
You are human; even you are permitted to make errors. You are encouraged to fail, and with these struggles, you are encouraged to learn.
You might not feel like you’re a great quality friend, you can’t find the right relationships, you find times when you’re struggling at work or school, and there are times when you wake up, but you wouldn’t want to get out of bed since you’re wondering, “Truly, what’s the point?”
Even on your darkest days, I assure you someone is struggling with the very same issues. You have to start giving more praise than you do to yourself. Before you would ask others to do, you have to believe in yourself initially. Get up every morning and pull yourself up instead of throwing yourself down. Find something positive and recall those attributes for yourself.
Life is just what you create of it, and you would leave out too much if you’re always bringing yourself down.
For those people who repeatedly tell you that all you do and decide is incorrect, so what? Everybody is so eager to cast judgment on others and their actions without considering that someone is continuously influenced by the words they spew out of their mouth. You are you, and you are more than enough.
The world and culture are continually evolving and trying to restrict you from adhering to a specific manner, and no one is prepared for the path. You were not born to fit into a frame.
Five tips to overcome this feeling
- Reinterpret the question.
This is where you remain mindful and figure out where you are by throwing a bright light in the dark position that you have lately been considering home.
Instead of having to repeat the normal, pessimistic, and profoundly unconstructive question, “Why can’t I get anything, right?” “try to turn that around and give it an optimistic twist. Rather, question yourself: “What are some things that I have done possibly the best?”
If you scan for them, they are all there. Pull them to the center of the stage and encourage them to take credit. Whenever you need a push, it might be best to write it down for ease of reference in a journal. As you enable the energy of optimism back within your mind, make a list to which you can include.
- Develop constructive thinking
Their propensity to be ceaseless is one of the most dangerous aspects of negative thoughts. In one’s mind, they create restraints of uncertainty, which are so difficult to break loose.
The negative self-talk now becomes new normal and is internalized. When your self-belief is weakened, the further you remain in your conviction that you can not do something correctly, that’ll probably be the reality. This is where you are let down by your consciousness, permitting these pessimistic gremlins to strengthen themselves constantly and construct a warped reality. Meditation is one of the most productive ways to refresh the pattern of thinking.
- Take a relaxing bath.
Although it might seem like a little and futile protection in the presence of the wave of negative thoughts and feelings you encounter, it is much more helpful than you would think to take the time for a proper warm bath or a bubble-brimmed bath. Your hard-working body supports you around the clock, going on with its job regardless of whether you’re on top of the game or fighting the forces that can’t get it right.
Taking some time out to appreciate its unfaltering efforts may offer you the reboot you need to break the cycle of negativity in your mind, specifically at the end of a very long and exhausting day. Take some time to relax and focus on how efficient you are indeed when you’re finished with your well-deserved rest.
- Rearrange and Declutter.
If you have been felt broken down for some time, persuaded of your failure to excel in something, it could be because you have let things slip inside your own home or your room.
The area around you can also reflect your state of mind if you’re an aesthetically-minded individual. Clutter evolves and so quietly populates a room that you might have scarcely registered the decrease. You can find, though, that the piles of ‘things’ that have accrued, and the subsequent chaos, are draining your capacity to think and concentrate effectively.
- Develop realistic targets.
It’s not complicated to realize that it is immediately frustrating to overload yourself with immense and potentially unattainable tasks. You will feel intimidated, to the extent of paralysis, perhaps. Be sure to restrict your self-expectations if you notice yourself in a slump so that you at least have a chance of growth.
Step back when confronted with a beast of a mission. You’ll have a more transparent summary from this viewpoint, allowing you to find achievable task morsels within the broader mission. The sheer magnitude of the ultimate difficulty will be whittled away when you cross these off one by one. You can cross it through on your checklist when you finish each micro mission. And let’s admit it to be one of life’s simple pleasures is the satisfaction of ticking stuff off the lists.
In this article, we explored the feeling of not being able to do anything right. Why do you feel this way? How can you make it right? What positive words do you need when you feel this way? These questions were answered above.
Side Note: I have tried and tested various products and services to help with my anxiety and depression. See my top recommendations here, as well as a full list of all products and services our team has tested for various mental health conditions and general wellness.
FAQ: I feel like I can’t do anything right
What to do when you can’t do anything?
Move with it. Often the mind and body’s means of hoping for rest is not to want to do something.
Get yourself outside.
Sorting through your feelings.
Talk to a friend.
Listen to music.
Try some simple tasks.
Check in to fulfill your needs.
How do I gain confidence in myself?
Imagine yourself as a person you want to be
Personal care is essential
Question your internal critical voice
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Uniacke, J. (2020, October 02). 10 Things To Do When You Feel Like You Can’t Do Anything Right. Retrieved November 22, 2020, from https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/14309/feel-like-i-cant-do-anything-right/
7th, Q., 7th, P., 16th, W., Nichole | Wildly Alive November 18th, 12th, L., 9th, C., . . . 30th, D. (2019, May 21). Low Self-Esteem: What Does it Mean to Lack Self-Esteem? Retrieved November 22, 2020, from https://www.psychalive.org/low-self-esteem/
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