How soon is too soon to move in?

As a BetterHelp affiliate, we may receive compensation from BetterHelp if you purchase products or services through the links provided

This article will show you how soon it is too soon to move in with your partner. The article will also show you will also explain when it may be time to move in together.

How soon is too soon to move in? 

If you are wondering how soon is too soon to move in together with your partner, here are some matters that may show you that this is the case.

The two of you haven’t faced a big disagreement yet 

When you move in together with someone it may lead to more arguments than you have had before. This happens because the two of you will be together more often, and dealing with the day-to-day can take a toll on the relationship. 

But moving in together before having experienced any major disagreements leaves you without knowing how your partner deals with conflict.

You won’t be able to know if they are willing to compromise, how they handle you putting your feet down for something, or even if they become aggressive when in an argument. You should know these things before you decide to take this big step than finding yourself living with someone that handles conflict in a completely different way than you.

If you haven’t dealt with any of the difficult parts of the relationship, it may be a sign that it is too soon to be thinking about moving in together. Take some time, and let the relationship progress a little more before doing it. 

You haven’t talked about your finances yet 

Although that is not the most romantic thing, it is important that, once you move in together, the two of you have dealt with the finances together. So if you haven’t had this conversation, and it is not clear what each of you will have as a financial responsibility in this relationship, it may be too soon to move in together.

So before doing that, try to learn what your partner’s spending habits are if any of you have debt, what is the financial goal the two of you can share, and if it is possible to rely on the other whenever a financial crisis comes. 

It is also important, before moving in together, that the two of you discuss how you will deal with the finances of the household, what each of you will be responsible for, and how you will share.

You are moving in together for the wrong reasons 

It may be too soon to move in together if you think you are doing it for the wrong reasons. It can be that you want to test if your relationship would go well through it, be it because you feel you can’t trust your partner, or even. After all,  you are afraid of committing and just want to rip the band-aid out. 

Or it can even be because the two of you are having problems and moving in together seems the way out of it. Either way, moving in together as a way out of a problem can only bring more trouble to your relationship. Try to deal with whatever is happening before making any rushed decisions.

There is pressure to do it

It can also be too soon to move in together if you feel that it is not something one of you genuinely wants. If you feel like your partner is pressuring you to do it, and they are constantly saying this is a good idea, even though you have doubts about it, it may be too soon for you.

When that is the case, you should make a point of looking at your own needs, and understanding how you are feeling. 

Talking to them about it, and reassuring them that not wanting to move in now is not a sign that you don’t love them, but rather that you just need some time can help make this process easier, and the two of you to move in together when it feels right.

Thinking about it has been making you feel anxious, or unsafe

It may be too soon to move in together if when you think about it you become too anxious, unsafe, or even unsure. If you feel that you can’t express yourself properly with your partner, it may be a sign that the two of you are deciding to move in together too soon.

How would it feel to live with someone with that you feel that you need to walk on eggshells around? Feeling like you could be yourself, and express yourself in whatever way possible is a key point to moving in together, so before you do it, make sure that is possible with your partner.

When should I move in with my partner? 

If you are trying to understand when it is time to move in together, here is when you should do it.

Do it when you have had a trial period 

It may be time for you and your partner to move in together when the two of you have had a trial period. It can be that you stayed in each other’s place frequently, went on long vacations together, or even lived together for a temporary period. So if those situations have worked well, it may be time to move in together.

When the two of you have traveled together 

Traveling is a great way to know your partner more, even their most intimate aspects. So if the two of you have traveled together, and you feel that the day-to-day with them was pleasurable to you, it may be a good indicator that it is time for the two of you to move in together.

The relationship came out stronger from an argument 

As said before, if the couple hasn’t dealt with an argument, it can be too soon to move in together, but if you feel that the two of you have dealt with the difficult parts of a relationship, and not only came out stronger from it, it is a clear sign that the two of you are ready to deal with the adversity, so you are ready to move in together.

The two of you have talked about your future together 

Moving in together means taking a step forward in the relationship. So if the two of you can discuss your future together, what each of you wants, and what are your common goals, it is a sign that the two of you are ready to move in together.

You met the people in each other’s life 

Being integrated into a person’s life means knowing their family and friends. And it is only through this that you will be able to consider a future together. So if you know them, and feel like you belong in your partner’s life, it is a clear sign to move in.

You have dealt with the financial situation 

As said before, it may be too soon to move in together if the two of you haven’t discussed the finances yet. But if you have made a point of discussing this matter, and reached an understanding about it, it will also make moving in together easier.

The two of you are committed to a long-term relationship 

Since moving in together can be such a big step, make sure to do so only when you realize that the two of you are ready for a long-term relationship. Doing it before that can only lead to frustration or even heartache.

You know each other well 

Living with someone means you will be with them for a long time. They are the people you will go to bed and wake up with. So make sure you know all you can about them, and that you can handle their little annoying habits, as well as they can handle yours.

Sharing the same space is easy even when dealing with an argument 

When you move in with someone you may have arguments but you will not get your own space. The person will still be in that house. So make sure that the two of you can be polite, to say the least, when you are dealing with an argument, and that living together won’t become unbearable.

It is something the two of you are excited about

As said before, it may be too soon to move in together if one of you feels unsafe, or unsure about this. So a clear sign it is time to do it is when the two of you are excited and looking forward to this next step.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ): How soon is too soon to move in? 

How long should I wait before moving in together?

Rather than having a timetable for when to move in together, it is important to do so when you feel that the two of you have dealt with all those matters that have been said before. If you feel that after 3 months your relationship has a lot of intimacy, and the two of you are ready, it can be.

There can be people that move in together after 3 months and have a long, and happy relationship, and others that do it after years, and it is a disaster. Just make sure that the two of you are on the same page about what you want out of moving in together.

How long do people usually wait to move in together?

Research has shown that 25% of people will move in with their partners after 4 months, 50% of them will do so after the first year of the relationship, and by two years into the relationship, 70% of them will have moved in together.

Can moving in too soon ruin a relationship?

Yes, moving in too soon can harm a relationship. It may lead the two of you to reach a conflict earlier, and the relationship may not be strong enough yet to deal with this impact. So before you move in together too soon, make sure to work on the foundation of your relationship, so it can endure the difficult times when you are living together.

How long does the honeymoon phase last?

There is no timetable for how long the honeymoon phase will last in a relationship. But it can last somewhere between six months and two years.

What is the difference between dating and being in a relationship?

Dating means that the two of you are getting to know each other, but being in a relationship implies that the two of you are committed to one another, and planning on making that connection stronger.

Conclusion 

This article explained how soon is too soon to move in together. It also gave you tips on how to identify when it is time to move in together.

If you have any questions or comments about this article, feel free to write them in the section below.

References

https://www.bustle.com/wellness/how-soon-is-too-soon-to-move-in-together

What was missing from this post which could have made it better?

[Sassy_Social_Share type="standard"]