He sends me pictures of his daughter (Tip)

In this article, we will discuss what it means when he sends you pictures of his daughter. Considering the matter, we will also give advice on how to bond with your partner’s children. 

After you’ve enjoyed the He sends me pictures of his daughter mentioned below, I would recommend you to take a look at ”My boyfriend puts his child before me” too.

He sends me pictures of his daughter – what does it mean?

If your significant other sends you pictures of his daughter, he is showing off that he is a responsible and mature man. It could also mean that he is that into you and maybe wants you to meet his kids looking to take it to the next step. 

Letting you know that it’s a package deal if you want to be with him or nothing at all. Could mean many different things, but you’ll be able to decide which one is the right one if you speak with him. Direct questions are always the better approach.

In this blog, we are going to focus on how to deal with the fact that your partner has children from a previous relationship/marriage. So, if you are interested in knowing how to relate to his daughter, keep reading.

Because of this act, one thinks Is he trying to get me pregnant on purpose?

But there are other signs his act might depict.

11 tips to bond with your partner’s children

1. Your partner’s children are your partner’s

It may seem obvious, but let me remind you one more time:

your partner’s children are YOUR PARTNER, that is, they are NOT YOURS.

So your “role” is not to be “HER mother”, or “HER father” because they ALREADY HAVE a parent. And this means that there are many decisions regarding certain aspects such as the school where they go, the dentist or things that the children may need, in which you do not have to intervene.

It will be their parents who will have to make those decisions, regarding their children.

And this at some point may make you feel a little “isolated”, but if you understand well that it is important that parents are the ones who decide about their children, you will live it much better.

2. You are the third (in order of arrival)

Let’s imagine that your partner had children with one person and then separated. After a while, you arrived and you found a “formed” family. Although the parents no longer lived together, they had created their first family.

I am going to tell you something that is very evident from an “external” point of view, but more complicated and difficult to accept, from an “internal” point of view.

The woman or man with whom your partner had children was “the first one.” Then the children came and they were “the second”. Finally, you arrive, and in the order of arrival in your partner’s life, you enter the “third place” (the moment you knew him).

This is very important that you have it clear because in your MIND there must be room for everyone.

Instead of feeling angry at not being “the first, be grateful for having a place in that new “family” that is created with your arrival.

In the new family, you have to have your place and the children theirs. They are different places, therefore there is not or should not be competition, although I know that emotionally, things are easier to say than to feel.

3. Your partner has to give you your place

We have already made it clear that you are neither the mother nor the father of your partner’s children, but you have a place in that family, and the father or mother must give you that place before their children.

Your place, in this case, is that you are the “new” partner of her father/mother. And he or she has to treat you like their partner, in front of their children.

I know that there are people who decide to wait a while to tell the children about the new relationship and that’s fine with me.

I am not saying that things have to be done in a certain way.

But the moment you decide, then he or she has to treat you as their partner. It is no longer worth treating you as “a friendship” because that would confuse the children and everyone.

4. Relationships take time

Any relationship needs time. But they need more time with children because if it were up to them, they would keep their parents together all their lives.

When a new couple arrives, EVERYONE needs a period of adaptation to the new family structure. Keep in mind that, to create a bond with your partner’s children, you will need time.

Do not pretend that the relationship flows from the first moment, although it is also true that it will depend on the child. Remember that relationships are made by both parties and you can do your part to get along, but depending on what the boy or girl puts theirs, the relationship will go one way or the other.

Talk to your partner and express how you feel, but remember to speak in the first person, so that the other does not interpret your feelings as an attack.

5. Love is not mandatory

They are not obligated to feel love for you, neither is it obligatory that you feel it for them. Especially at the beginning.

Above all, do not judge yourself and stay calm, as it is very normal to feel totally opposite emotions.

6. Find something to share with the children

From my point of view, sharing something you enjoy generates a feeling of well-being that causes emotional barriers to drop.

It was also an opportunity to spend some time alone with her, listen to her and “be present”, with her and for her.

And those moments are making the relationship closer.

7. Share time doing something together

The new family structure needs experiences, memories, moments and experiences that will gradually make all members of the group relax and feel belonging to it.

To do this, the new family system must share time, space, moments and, if possible, do something that children like. It can be going to a certain place or doing some activity together.

The important thing is that there is an experience of something pleasant with the new family structure, which helps to consolidate it.

8. Tell the child what you don’t like directly

In this section, I would like to point out three things:

• You can’t keep telling him what you don’t like or what he’s doing wrong
• Choose well the moment and the tone in which you say it
• Tell him only one thing at a time.

Talk to your partner and decide together. In fact, your partner has to help you a lot in the relationship with his children and, if he doesn’t, you have to ask him.

He has to teach his children to respect you, to value you and to take you into account.

9. You are a role model

You are with them and they are growing. They may not always be by your side if parents have joint custody, but children “copy” adults. And, specifically, to those with whom they have a close and important relationship.

So although you are not their mother or father, you are an important person to them and tell them that they are going to be watching you and, if they like what they see, they will end up imitating you.

This is where your role gains importance and you can teach them your values, with your example. Remember that an action is worth a thousand words. 

10. If the relationship does NOT prosper, accept it

There are times when the more you try and the more you give and do, the relationship with your partner’s children reaches a cordial or “politically correct” relationship, that is, you can speak correctly but there is no loving relationship.

This usually hurts, if you would have liked to have a “good” relationship and it ends up being simply “correct”.

Nothing happens, just as it is not mandatory to want, nor is it mandatory to have a wonderful relationship. You can be correct or sometimes even not have a relationship.

In these cases, it is very important that you accept things as they are because, as I mentioned before, EVERYTHING does not depend on you. And if you already tried it and it didn’t work, then accepting it will help you manage it better.

11. Don’t forget to take care of yourself

Last but not least, I want to tell you that the process of creating a bond with your partner’s children is not easy and you are going to have to take great care of yourself and be attentive to your needs.

You will have to be patient with you and accept and manage those emotions that arise.

Treat yourself with love, don’t be too demanding with yourself and give yourself time to assimilate your new situation.

Living together is difficult with anyone, so friction will always arise and things that bother you, too. It’s about managing your emotions, giving them space, asking yourself how you feel and what you need.

My advice is that, when the situation is beyond you, stop. Find a quiet place, focus on your breath and relocate to your centre. Meditate. Remember who you are and focus your attention on yourself. The most important relationship you have to have with you, if you keep that, the rest, you can overcome.

Women also start to panic and worry when men show them pictures of their family because they don’t know what this action really means. To cause yourself less tension, you should know what a guys actions really mean.

FAQ on he sends me pictures of his daughter

Conclusions

In this article, we discussed what it means when he sends you pictures of his daughter. Considering the matter, we also gave you advice on how to bond with your partner’s children. 

If your significant other sends you pictures of his daughter, he is showing off that he is a responsible and mature man. It could also mean that he is that into you and maybe wants you to meet his kids looking to take it to the next step. 

When a man introduces you to his child it means that you must be very important to him. Introducing a possible partner to your child is not always easy. It takes time to find the “right” person for your child to meet. 

If you have other questions or comments in the content, please let us know!

References

Familyeducation.com – Winning Over Your Partner’s Child

Closeronline.co.uk – How to cope when your partner has children

Divorcemag.com – 5 Rules for Introducing a New Partner to Your Kids After Divorce