Genderfae (what does it mean?)

In this blog post, we explain what being a genderfae is like.

We also define the following terms: gender identity, aporagender, androgyne, agender, non-binary and sexual orientation. 

Being a genderfae 

The term genderfae describes a person who never will feel like a male or like having masculine traits.

However, genderfae should not be confused with being a female, because it is an umbrella term for genders other than male and female – aporagender; it also includes androgyne identity, feeling agender or many other non-binary identities.  

Another type of gender, the Genderfaun is also an umbrella term, for people who never feel like females.

Below we will talk about all these gender identities, in order to comprehend the term genderfae, starting with what is gender identity. 

What is gender identity?

In the context of the LGBTQIAP + community, gender, or gender identity, is a person’s subjective and personal experience in relation to social gender categories.

Every society has gender categories and expectations that can be associated with certain sexual physical characteristics; these categories can serve as a basis for personal gender identity in relation to society.

In a binary gender system, most people adhere to and reinforce ideals of masculinity and femininity in all aspects of sex and gender: physical sexual characteristics, gender identity and gender expression.

In all societies, there are people who do not identify, partly or completely, with the gender associated with their physical sexual characteristics. 

Currently, these people can identify themselves as transgender (trans), genderqueer or non-binary people.

People who identify with the gender associated with them at birth are generally categorized as cisgender people or cis.

Some societies have other gender systems.

For example, some Native American societies have the genus two-spirits, and some South Asian countries have hijra as an official gender other than women or men.

Although an academic focus is not the objective of this text, it is interesting to note that in the academic context, there is a distinction between sex (anatomy of the individual’s reproductive system, secondary sexual characteristics) and gender, which can refer to the social roles that are associated according to the “sex” that society assigns, or can refer to personal gender based on self-awareness (gender identity). 

However, in day-to-day conversations, it is common that there is no distinction between the terms “sex” and “gender” and both are used interchangeably.

In essence, gender does not depend on the person’s genitals or appearance, current or desired, just as it is not necessary or immutable: for example, there are people of gender or gender-fluid.

The origin of personal gender identity is not clear, as it is possible that there are as many social as biological factors, however, regardless of the origin, gender is not a personal choice, as it is a completely unconscious personal process.

There is also the expression of gender, which is the way that a person can express his gender visually in society.

For example, gender-neutral people may seek a more neutral look (even if it is in relation to binary genders).

Gender identities can be constituted by lack of gender, presence of a “pure” gender, presence of several genders (one at a time or several at the same time), presence of one or more genders affected by cultural/neurological/biological factors or uncertainty about the gender itself, among other types of identities. Read more about different gender identities here.

Aporagender

Aporagender means a gender-separate from man/boy, woman/girl, and nothing in between while still having a sense of gender. Apo in Greek means “separate”, thus aporagender is a non-binary, separate gender.

Aporagender is considered an umbrella term since it includes some types of non-binary and genderqueers identities, but aporagender does not necessarily refer to one distinct gender.

Aporagender is not agender –  Agender means not having a sense of gender, it’s a person who views themselves as “without gender”, while aporagender means having a strong sense of gender, just different from male or female. 

Aporagender is not androgyne – Androgyne is a term that comes from the Greek words Andras (man) and gyné (woman) and refers to a mixture of feminine and masculine characteristics. 

Aporagender is not genderless – Genderless is synonym with agender, meaning a person who has no gender identity and expression. 

Aporagender is not apogender – Apogender is someone who, besides feeling like they have no gender, has apathy towards the notion of gender in general. An aporagender has a strong feeling of having a gender identity. 

Although similar, aporagender is not neutroisNeutrois is feeling no inner sense of gender expression; furthermore, aporagender people do not think they are gender-neutral, as some neutrois describe themselves. 

Although similar, aporagender is not maveriqueMaverique is a specific gender identity, while aporagender is more like an umbrella term, that includes other non-binary or genderqueer people. 

Androgyne

Androgyne is a term that comes from the Greek words Andras (man) and gyné (woman) and refers to a mixture of feminine and masculine characteristics.

Androgen is an enviable advantage that androgens can have.

The myth of the androgynous appears in Plato’s work. According to him, androgynous beings lived on Earth in the beginning.

They looked like two people glued back to back: two women, two men or a man and a woman.

They had great power, they could do almost anything they thought.

The gods feared the almost infinite power of the androgynous and, in order not to pose a possible threat, separated them. Separately, however, the parties could do nothing.

In modern history, a real detonation in the cultivation of the androgynous image in culture took place in the ’80s, when music became invaded by stars like Michael Jackson, Boy George, Prince, Annie Lennox.

In fact, Lady Gaga continues this trend today. However, in almost all of these examples, the androgynous aspect was limited to makeup and clothing.

In addition, although androgynous creativity is present in art and science, it is in no way associated with business creativity.

Here, masculinity seems to be most strongly associated with success.

Studies have found that top managers are not perceived as creative by employees. Nature shows its complexity again.

Although from the point of view of sexual attraction (and social and cultural norms) femininity and masculinity gain as much as possible, intellectually, the combination of traits seems to be ideal.

Agender

In the spectrum of gender identity, not to mention sexual orientations, there is one called Agender who are those who do not identify themselves as women or men; the definition can also fit between the terms genderqueer, non-binary, neutral, bi-gender or fluid gender depending on the particularity of the case.

It is a community that prefers to be referred to as “they”, not he or she, who do not see in pink or blue, who dress mixing male and female garments beyond a simple androgynous image; they feel limited in public restrooms labelled male or female, and would prefer one that points to another or no gender, a group that suffers discrimination and violence even more than the transsexual community.

Non-binary

The term non-binary is used by individuals who do not identify as men or women. In other words, they find themselves on a fluid spectrum between the terms man and woman. 

Non-binary, in essence, is the term used for those who do not identify with the gender to which they were assigned at birth.

For this reason, many non-binary people consider themselves part of the trans or LGBT community.

Someone who is not binary does not see himself as a man or a woman specifically.

This is a very broad way of saying that these people do not see themselves in the way society said they should be.

A non-binary person may also struggle with sexual orientation and may even consider it transgender so that their body reflects what is most closely identified with sex.

Being non-binary can be very difficult because for the rest of your life you have been dropped into a certain category and you can’t even choose any of the categories as one “because it’s not what you feel”.

This can make you feel like you don’t belong, and that’s a little life-changing because when you don’t feel like you’re included in life, you feel alone and left out. It can make you withdrawn and less likely to engage with other people.

However, being non-binary is not something that someone chooses, but rather it is at a deeper level. It has the ability to change your life in many ways!

Side Note: I have tried and tested various products and services to help with my anxiety and depression. See my top recommendations here, as well as a full list of all products and services our team has tested for various mental health conditions and general wellness.

What is sexual orientation?

Sexual orientation, an expression often called sexuality, is essentially an identity that expresses the conditions of a person to feel sexual attraction to someone, or, occasionally, what relationship a person has with sexual attraction and/or sexual relations.

The sexual attraction is finding someone sexually attractive; think that a certain person is hot, and consequently want to have sex with them.

Of course, there are other social factors that cause sexual attraction to not always end in an advance with sexual intentions towards another person.

People with heterosexual sexual orientation are privileged.

Many do not even know the word, thinking only that they are “normal”. Heterosexual people are people of binary genders who only feel sexual attraction to people of the gender considered “opposite” to yours.

Attraction, love, marriage and sex between a man and a woman are seen as the norm of society.

This is a phenomenon called heteronormativity or heterosexism.

Attraction or sexual relations between two men or between two women are often seen as denatured, false, or just for purposes of rebellion or experimentation.

A man’s lack of sexual attraction to a woman, or vice versa, is also frowned upon by society.

Often, a man wanting to “catch” several women is seen as necessary for a standard of masculinity, while women are pressured to satisfy sexually those they date or are married to. 

Not feeling like talking about colleagues or hot celebrities is seen as a sign of childishness or unnaturality.

The structure that dictates that anyone needs to feel sexual attraction and want sexual relationships is called zedsexism, zednormativity, allonormativity, allosexism, allonormativity or allosexism.

The presence of sexual attraction for more than one gender is seen as a sign of promiscuity, infidelity or insecurity, or perhaps even as a sign that the person is lying or having trouble admitting that “in fact” he is gay, lesbian or hetero.

The structure that dictates that people need to be attracted to just one gender is called monosexism.

A person who calls himself gay feels a sexual and romantic attraction to people of the same or similar genders, most of the time.

This is because many people do not think about other types of guidance, or see no need for them.

For this reason, many people use sexual orientation or sexuality as a generic term for general guidance, although not all people prioritize their sexual orientation or have labels only for their sexual orientation.

To read more about other types of guidance, read our pages on romantic guidance and other types of guidance.

Conclusions

In this blog post, we explained what being a genderfae is like.

We also defined the following terms: gender identity, aporagender, androgyne, agender, non-binary and sexual orientation. 

The term genderfae describes a person who never will feel like a male or like having masculine traits.

However, genderfae should not be confused with being a female, because it is an umbrella term for genders other than male and female – aporagender; it also includes androgyne identity, feeling agender or many other non-binary identities.  

If you have any questions, comments or recommendations on the subject, please let us know!

Further reading

Exploring the Dimensions of Human Sexuality, by  Jerrold S. Greenberg

Diversity in Couple and Family Therapy: Ethnicities, Sexualities, and Socioeconomics, by Shalonda Kelly

Identities and Inequalities: Exploring the Intersections of Race, Class, Gender, & Sexuality (B&b Sociology) by David Newman 

Just Your Type: Create the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted Using the Secrets of Personality Type, by Paul D. Tieger 

What we recommend for Relationship & LGBTQ issues

Relationship counselling

  • If you are having relationship issues or maybe you are in an abusive relationship then relationship counselling could be your first point of call. Relationship counselling could be undertaken by just you, it does not require more than one person.

LGBTQ issues

If you are dealing with LGBTQ issues then LGBTQ counselling may be a great option for you. Maybe you are confused as to your role and identity or simply need someone to speak to. LGBTQ counsellors are specially trained to assist you in this regard.

References

transequality.org/

Genderqueerid.com

nonbinary.wiki/

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