Should I take a gay test?

When you are trying to find out your orientation, you might find yourself getting complicated in the journey. This is because you are living in a society where most people are expected to be straight.

You should remember that you are the only person who can figure out your orientation. Most of us have experiences being straight only to find out we prefer someone else.

There are some who find their orientation when they keep seeing these sexual fantasies and thoughts that can occur in their minds and when they see other people. This is because these people believe that they are making themselves know their orientation through their sexual orientation.

Of course, there are more implications that will clearly state that you are gay aside from sexual attraction and this will be explained by the following examples below.

Is there a quiz I can take to know if I’m gay?

There are several websites that can offer you a test if you are gay and this blog will be followed with the test as well. However, you need to remember that people who consider themselves are very unique from each other.

In this case, you shouldn’t take the results fo the test too seriously since there are some tests that might not be accurate in knowing if you are gay. You should know that you are the only who can make the final decision if you are truly gay.

Side Note: I grew this blog to over 500,000 monthly pageviews and it now finances our charitable missions. If you are looking to start a blog as a source of income or to help your community then view our how to start a blog guide.

Then how am I supposed to know that I’m gay?

There’s no right method in figuring out one’s sexual orientation. It will depend on the person’s interactions and how he sees himself.

There are also discrimination that you are going to face but with the group of this sexual minority, you can be motivated to reveal your real self little by little. You need to realize that being yourself is a healthy way of living and this can start by gaining confidence through social support and through your own support.

How can I ever be sure that my orientation is gay?

There is no perfect answer to knowing your gender orientation for sure. You may find yourself to think that you are one gender orientation but you will find out soon enough that you prefer another gender orientation.

You need to remember confusion is part of finding your identity and you can choose that gender orientation when you want to. Having 2 gender orientations doesn’t mean that you don’t have a clear identity but it only shows that you can choose who you want to be and that’s alright.

Is there anything that ‘causes’ gender orientation?

There is no definite answer to what causes gender orientation. You might be straight because you feel like you were born this way.

You might think your gay because of how you respond to some attractive people in the same sex. In this case, it matters what you choose and the causes can form as motivations for you to be a certain gender orientation.

What does this mean for my sexual and reproductive health as a person?

Sex education primarily focuses on straight people where there is a high chance of pregnancy or other gender orientations that may make for pregnancy such as bisexuality and others. This can lead to people in the sexual minority not knowing what to do when it comes to sexual health.

There is also discrimination that involves people in the sexual minority where they are more prone to sexually transmitted diseases even though this is not true. You can always ask a doctor who specializes in the LGBTQA+ group to get some advice for this health.

You should read a few gay rape stories to understand the issues gay community faces in our society, due to the rights they are deprived of.

Do I have to tell people about my sexual orientation?

You don’t need to tell them your gender orientation if you don’t want to. This doesn’t mean that you are a liar when you are hiding your gender orientation because you are not ready to show the world your identity yet.

It takes time for you to come out but you can manage it in time when you are ready.

What implications can this hiding have?

Some people might accept you for your coming out to them as part of the sexual minority. You can also keep hiding it when you need to since you are still uncomfortable.

Some people who belong int he sexual minority feel free when they come out to people who support them for being honest about themselves. You can still keep things slow and only come out when you are ready.

How can I go about telling my gender orientation to someone?

You can go telling someone about you being another gender orientation to people who are more comfortable with this status quo. This can help you get comfortable in telling people that might not be comfortable at first about your gender orientation.

You can tell them in any means whether text, email or face-to-face. You might find yourself doing the following statements:

  • (After thinking about it a lot, I’ve realized that I’m gay. This means I’m attracted to men.)
  • (Since you’re important to me, I want to let you know that I’m gay. I’d appreciate your support.)
    (I’ve figured out that I’m actually gay which means I’m attracted to people of the same sex as I am.)

You could end the conversation with a resource guide that can help your family members understand what you are going through. You should also welcome support when it appears after the conversation.

What should I do if the coming out doesn’t go well?

You might find your family members or friends to not take you seriously when you have just come out. Some of them might think that you are messing with them.

When this situation occurs, you should do the following:

  • Surround yourself with supportive people for your social support. Whether it’s LGBTQIA+ people you’ve met online or in person, your friends, or accepting family members, try to spend time with them and talk to them about the situation with your gender orientation.
  • Remember that you’re not the one in the wrong in the coming out. There’s nothing wrong with you or your gender orientation as your identity. The only wrong thing here is the intolerance for the specific gender orientation.
  • If you want, give them space to improve their reaction to your coming out. By this, I mean that they may have realized their initial reaction was wrong about you. Send them a message to let them know you’re willing to talk when they’ve had some time to process what you said about your coming out.

You should always remember that there are other people who can support even if other people who are close to you don’t support you at all. If you find yourself in trouble, you need to go to a shelter for the sexual minority or the LGBTQIA+ group to help you.

You can always get in touch with The Trevor Project at 866-488-7386. This service can give you listening ears if you are feeling suicidal or just want someone to talk to about your struggles with your gender orientation.

Where can I find support for my gender orientation?

You can join some in-groups of the LGBTQIA+ communities to help you settle in to your social support. The following are support groups that you can access:

  • Join Facebook groups, subreddits, and online forums for LGBTQIA+ people for your social support.
  • The Trevor Project has a number of hotlines and resources for people in need of social support.
  • The Centers for Disease Control and PreventionTrusted Source has compiled resources on LGBTQIA+ health to help your wellbeing.
  • The Asexual Visibility and Education Network wiki site has a number of entries relating to sexuality and orientation to help you know more about yourself.

Side Note: I have tried and tested various products and services to help with my anxiety and depression. See my top recommendations here, as well as a full list of all products and services our team has tested for various mental health conditions and general wellness.

Gay test

This test will be answering the question if you are gay or not. You might be wondering about this when you have noticed your sexual preference.

Instructions: This test will indicate if you are gay or not. Please read the questions carefully and choose the choice that applies to you in each question. Please answer the questions honestly to get an accurate result.

Are your sexual fantasies about the opposite sex?

  • Yes – 0
  • No – 1

Do you take a long time to get ready in the morning just so you would look attractive when you get to work or school?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Do you not let your eyebrows get plucked, trimmed or in some other method modified?

  • Yes – 0
  • No – 1

Do you prefer to go to bed with the same sex?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Do you have a lot of different perfumes?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Do you hate doing things that are meant for the opposite sex such as wearing a lipstick?

  • Yes – 0
  • No – 1

Do you have many pairs of shoes for each occasion?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Did you stare at someone who is the same sex because he is cute or attractive for you?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Do you have a lot of friends who are of the opposite sex?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Have you been called gay often?

  • Yes – 1
  • No – 0

Total scoring criteria:

6 – 10 points – gay

4 – 5 points – somewhat gay

0 – 3 points – not gay

What we recommend for Relationship & LGBTQ issues

Relationship counselling

  • If you are having relationship issues or maybe you are in an abusive relationship then relationship counselling could be your first point of call. Relationship counselling could be undertaken by just you, it does not require more than one person.

LGBTQ issues

If you are dealing with LGBTQ issues then LGBTQ counselling may be a great option for you. Maybe you are confused as to your role and identity or simply need someone to speak to. LGBTQ counsellors are specially trained to assist you in this regard.


Healthline. How Do You Know If You’re Gay, Straight, or Something in Between?.

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