Family drama – learning strategies in how to deal with the family drama.
In this guide, we are going to discuss why family drama produces and how to deal with it.
The family is the cornerstone of society. We love being around our family and sharing fun moments. We feel good when we are facing a problem and we have our family by our side, knowing that we can count on your support. Anyway, there is nothing better than family.
Everything in the family is not perfect. You can not always imagine the family as that group of people who get along and always give support, often the opposite happens. There are families where everything is fighting, discussion, problems, that is, family drama.
We have all experienced some kind of drama in our family. This family drama can be due to any situation, the least thing can unleash a war in the family. Sometimes we can say that it is normal and we deal with it, but many times we get tired and do not know how long we will endure another family war.
Sometimes it causes us sadness to see when in our family producing some kind of drama. It seems like our family does not fulfil the perfect vision that the media wants to show when in reality it is the opposite. There are no perfect families. Those where there is only love, peace and tranquillity, the one where there is always 100% support and will always be there. That’s why family drama exists because nothing is perfect.
In families there are problems. There is always a member that causes some kind of conflict, maybe that member could be you and me, but there is always someone. There is always someone willing to create gossip, another member who never wants to meet with the family member, another who is not accepted, that is, there is a bit of everything.
In many cases, we have to deal with and endure family dramas since we do not want to be the cause of the drama spreading, but it is important to know that there is a limit. If none of your family members can end the drama, it seems it is time for you to take the reins and decide to end all the problem that has been causing all that family drama.
Every family drama has a reason why it originates, so it is important to know what causes it to know how to act. Sometimes the reason why problems are created in our families may seem silly, but we must remember that we are different and have different ways of interpreting the world and its facts.
What is a family drama?
A family drama can be defined as the conflicts that originate in the middle of a family. The causes can be of any kind, involving one or more family members.
Why does family drama occur?
The reasons why family drama occurs are many. Perhaps you have seen yourself in a situation where you disagreed with some opinion of your family and this was the cause of a fight or discussion. That is, any situation or comment can generate a family drama. Here are some of the most common actions by which a family drama can be generated:
Non-acceptance of the partner of one of the family members
There are families where the person with whom one of its members may be dating can unleash a war. You might have found yourself in a situation where one of your parents or other family members does not accept the person you are with or were dating. It may be that these were moments of great tension for you because you knew they did not accept your decision.
This creates a lot of trouble because it is the opinion of the parents against yours. The argument that they are the parents and know what they do is more than enough for them to have to accept what they say. Maybe you had to access what they wanted for peace, but maybe you didn’t accept it and you didn’t care about the problems it caused.
Money is one of those issues that will always cause problems among some of the family members. Issues related to inheritance, theft or returns are like a time bomb, at any time it can explode. It is normal to see how inheritances cause families to divide, how to lend money and then that this family member does not return it causes enmity.
In a family where religious practices are an important issue, there will always be some kind of conflict. This may be if one of its members does not want to carry the religion or it is the case that one of them goes out with a person who does not practice or is from another religion.
For long years it has been seen how religions have caused problems among families, some of them displacing members of their family because they do not respect religious rules.
Divorces or separations
Family separations are very painful and in many cases, they cause problems among family members. There are situations where there are parents who fight for the custody of the children, who will keep the most goods or who have to leave the house. Divorces are difficult and everyone suffers due to them.
Choose above the decision of others
Maybe you’ve seen yourself in a situation where your parents want to choose everything for you. They say they know what is best for you and they don’t let you decide for yourself, this can unleash a family drama. An example is when choosing a university career. Parents yearn for their children to study a certain career and their children disagree. This leads both to a long dispute.
When a family member is going through a physical or mental health situation, this can cause problems due to many reasons. Sometimes they do not reach an agreement on who has to take care of the sick relative, the patient does not accept any kind of medical help or there is simply no money to cover the needs that the sick person needs. Sometimes the drama comes from the sadness of not being able to do something to help a person who needs it. An example is of a person who has drug addiction problems. A person who is addicted many times does not recognize that it has a problem, but those around him do. This creates tension and a big family problem.
What can I do to eliminate family drama?
The family drama will always be present and there will be times in which you will not be able to escape, but here are some strategies that you can put into practice to reduce family tensions and have greater harmony.
The first action is communication, but not a communication where everyone is screaming and nobody listens since that is fighting. Communicate is to express passively and calmly the situation that you want to communicate. No matter what the reason for the fight is, but discussing will not solve any problems. If you are not the cause of the conflict, try to be the mediator and not take sides from either side but to create an environment of stability.
Sometimes the person who acts as a mediator can suffer certain insults, do not take it personally, but annoying people are not often acting consciously. Always try to keep control.
When the cause of the family drama’s motive has been discovered, the focus is to find a solution. Everything is discussed in the discussions except the solution to the problem. Try the conversation to guide you to find a solution. Every problem has a solution, is that sometimes fights do not allow people to focus on finding it.
Understanding is fundamental in all family drama. The person or people who are fighting feels that they are not taken into account and that raising their voice is the only way to be heard. Try to understand the reasons that lead to the person fighting.
Remember that family dramas are always present. We will not always have control over what happens with each member of our family, but using these techniques can help reduce tension and allow things to go a better way.
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FAQs about family drama
How to tell my parents that I don’t want to study the career they chose for me?
Sit with your parents and be clear about the reasons why you don’t want to study that career. Talk to them about what you are passionate about and what you want to put all your effort into.
My parents don’t trust me because of my bad decisions, how can I regain their trust?
Start acting the right way and eventually they will trust you again. This is not something done overnight because it takes time to trust someone again, but you can regain your trust if you decide to act honestly.
How to tell to my religious parents that I am gay?
It is never easy for a person to talk to their family about their sexual preference and more if it is religious. The first is talk to people you can trust to serve as a support group, then gather your parents and calmly express how you feel. At first, they may not take it lightly but each person has their way of articulating the news. Your reaction may make you feel a little bad, but try to be strong and realize that you are taking a big step.
How to help a member of my family who is addicted to drugs?
Helping an addicted person is not always easy. You must talk calmly to the addicted person about the seriousness of its condition and the consequences if it does not seek help.
How to deal with my parents’ divorce?
Acceptance is the first step. A divorce is not easy to digest but if your parents don’t get along together, the decision to separate was the best for both of you. Understand that his love for you will not change and that sometimes these situations happen. Because there is a marriage separation does not mean that the family also separates.
Family drama will always be present in some families more than others, but in the end, it will always be there. It’s hard to see fights between the members of our families, but not everything will always be fine. If there is a family drama happening around you, communication and understanding will be your best allies. Fights are a way of communicating, although it is not correct. Talk to your family and have the dynamics focus on finding solutions.
What we recommend for Relationship & LGBTQ issues
- If you are having relationship issues or maybe you are in an abusive relationship then relationship counselling could be your first point of call. Relationship counselling could be undertaken by just you, it does not require more than one person.
If you are dealing with LGBTQ issues then LGBTQ counselling may be a great option for you. Maybe you are confused as to your role and identity or simply need someone to speak to. LGBTQ counsellors are specially trained to assist you in this regard.
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