Falling out of love and depression (+Understanding the relationship)

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This article will discuss how being depressed can make you fall out of love with your partner. Along with that, it will show warning signs that this might be happening, and what can be done to prevent it from going further.

Can depression make you fall out of love? 

Yes, depression can make you fall out of love. Depression can make you have a negative outlook on everything, it can make your view of yourself, and your relationship becomes worse. 

It can make you feel like you are not in love with your partner anymore when in reality it might just be anhedonia, a symptom of depression that can make you lose interest in everything.

So before ending your relationship because you think you feel out of love with your partner, you might want to consider if you are depressed. Let’s discuss what depression is, and what are the signs you can look for to discover if you are depressed.

What are signs of depression to be on the lookout for? 

It can be hard for some people to understand that they are depressed. They might just feel dissatisfied with their entire life, and start to behave differently without knowing why. If you take a closer look, you can understand what is going on, and look for professional help.

If you are depressed, you can feel your mood is low, and you can feel intense sadness. Along with that, you may lose pleasure in doing anything, even what you used to love. It can make you feel hopeless, empty, and irritable.

Depression can also impact your sleep and eating patterns, and make you feel less energetic. Not only that, people with depression will experience fatigue, low self-esteem, and decreased sense of self-worth. It can also lead to guilt, unexplained pain, and headaches.

And even though each person with depression can manifest it differently, a person will be considered depressed if they experience its symptoms for more than two weeks. So if that is your case, you might want to look for professional help.

But isn’t it possible that I am falling out of love?

Yes, it can be that it is not only depression that is impacting your relationship. It can be that you are falling out of love. But it is important to understand how to differentiate falling out of love from other feelings, such as anger, resentment. 

Anger and resentment tend to be both red flags in relationships. It is common to get angry, or even resent your partner, but if you both hold on to those feelings for a long time, it can bring your relationship down. But it doesn’t mean that you get angry, or resent your partner, you won’t love them anymore.

What you can do is try to understand if you are frustrated because they made you experience those emotions. And if you can set those apart, understand what caused your anger and resentment, talk them over with your partner, and then carry on with the relationship.

But there are other feelings, such as detachment that can indicate you might have fallen out of love with someone. When you feel detached from the person, it means that they are not giving you any positive or negative emotions. This sense of indifference can be a sign you have fallen out of love.

You may not feel the need to be with someone else or have the interest to be with someone else, but most importantly, you don’t want to be with your partner. But when discussing falling out of love and depression, it is important to highlight how this sense of detachment is a common symptom of depression.

But if you are questioning if it is because you are falling out of love, or due to depression, you need to observe your sense of detachment in the other aspects of your life. 

If this is present in a lot of the other areas of your life, it might be depression, but if you experience only concerning your relationship, it is a great indicator that you have fallen out of love.

What can I do if it is happening to me? 

If you are considering if you are falling out of love, or if you are depressed. Before taking any action on your relationship, you should figure that out. If you realize you are depressed, you may want to think if it started before or after the relationship started. 

If it came before, it might be that your partner fell in love with the person you are when you are depressed.

They are not to blame for your condition, they may have made it worse, or in some cases made you feel more protected, having a positive impact on you. So to decide what to do, you might want to look for professional help, namely a therapist.

With one, you will be able to talk, without any judgment about your thoughts and feelings. It will help you understand them better and learn more about your triggers, and how that relationship may be impacting you, and your mental health. If it turns out they are not good for you, it might mean it is time to call it quits.

Before doing it, you can do an exercise to imagine how your life would be without your partner. Or even how it would feel to you to know they have somebody else. If thinking of those possibilities doesn’t bring you any feelings, it is a sign you have fallen out of love.

But if you feel anything when considering those possibilities, it can mean that you are still in love with them, but your depression is affecting your emotions and the way you express them. In those cases, therapy will help you find better ways to express your emotions.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ): Can depression make you fall out of love?

What are the signs I am falling out of love? 

When you are falling out of love with someone it can show in some actions or behaviors. You may start to resent your partner. It can feel because you don’t feel appreciated, and it can start to slowly drift you from your partner. 

Leading you to become indifferent to them, which can make you not want to invest in the relationship.

And spending time together can be something you start to avoid. You need to recognize this feeling to decide if you want to change it, or if the relationship is close to an end for you. Because if you feel it might be close to an end, it can lead you to open yourself up to connecting to other people.

Once you are falling out of love, you may start to say bad things about your partner to other people, and there is no desire to be intimate with them. Along with that, you lose that future perspective, and planning a future together is not something that is on your mind anymore.

How do I tell my partner I don’t love them anymore? 

Telling someone you don’t love them anymore is always difficult. So try to keep in mind how hurtful this can be, and all the history you share. Be sensible and try to do it in a comfortable place, and private, so you can have this difficult task.

Explain to them what has changed from your perspective. And explain that since things have changed, you can’t be a good partner anymore. They might ask you what happened, and if there is anything that can be done to change your mind. You may try to explain it briefly, but mostly show just how this is not working for you anymore.

You don’t need to play the blame game. And once you decide that there is no way back, let them know that there is no hope for this. Take charge of your feelings, and speak about them. That may be hard since people usually want to avoid uncomfortable conversations. 

So say what you mean, and don’t suggest you can be friends. This can be misleading, and imply that friendship is a consolation prize. They will need time to heal, give it to them.

Why do women fall out of love? 

Some reasons can make a woman fall out of love. It can happen when they don’t feel appreciated. Which men usually do so well at the beginning of the relationship, but it gets lost somewhere along with it. It can also happen when the relationship doesn’t bring them excitement anymore, and it turns boring.

Once the honeymoon phase is over, reality might sink in, and seeing their partner for who they are can make them fall out of love. As well as when they see that there are no physical or emotional connections with their partners.

What can I do if I still love my ex?

If you feel it has been hard to get over your ex, you may want to distract yourself. Find other things and people you can invest energy in. Along with that, try to have some distance and delete them from your life. Avoid being in social media or places you might run into them.

Focus on taking care of yourself. Be it emotionally, or physically. And understand that getting over someone is a process that can take some time. You can talk about it with your friends or family, and if you realize it is being too hard on you emotionally, you can look for professional help.

Why is it hard for me to get over my ex?

Getting over an ex is never easy, but some things can make it harder. Getting over them can be hard when you feel lonely, because you may start to think that the only person you were connected to was them.

It can also happen when you lose confidence in yourself with this relationship. Abusive relationships tend to lead you to believe that the only right person for you was that partner, so getting over them can be extremely hard.

Along with that, having in mind only the positive aspects of the relationship can make it harder for you to let go. So next time you think about what had been, try to look at the good and the bad. You may also have some trouble with letting go. And this might not only be in your relationship, but it is something important to work on.

Conclusion 

This article discussed how depression can impact your relationship, and how it can lead you to fall out of love. Along with that, it explained what are signs that depression can give you that you are not well, and what can be done if you notice it is impacting your relationship.

If you have any questions or comments about this article, feel free to write it in the section below.

References

https://medium.com/@rfribeiro/have-i-fallen-out-of-love-because-of-depression-or-do-i-not-love-my-partner-anymore-bf2b80554304
https://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/depression/5-signs-depression-eroding-your-relationship/

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