Does your mom cause you anxiety?

Does your mom cause you anxiety?

Moms can generally contribute to the advancement of anxiety in their children. This may be a product of different natural and environmental variables.

Some children tend to deal with this anxiety effectively by talking about it with their other family members or their friends while the others keep it within themselves leading to a build-up of stress and emotional pressure.

Even when the children share a cordial relationship with their parents may trigger their anxiety unintentionally.

under such circumstances, a parent must pay close attention to their choice of words and the demands that they put forward for their children.

Being mindful about their interactions with their parents might help avoid situations where the children feel anxious.

What are the major triggers of anxiety caused by one’s mom?

A demand for perfection

It is reported that children exhibit anxiety that is usually triggered by their mother due to a demand for perfection on the mother’s side.

Children usually feel anxious when they aren’t able to keep up with the standards put forward by their mothers.

They usually have a notion that they failed their mother’s expectations and are responsible for the consequences and disappointment.

Anxiousness projected by the mother

A child may experience anxiety because they observed their mother being anxious. Behaviorists believe that anxious behavior can be learned like any other behavior through observation and imitation.

Unpredictable nature of the mother

It is seen that when children grow up in families where uncertainty prevailed, they show some sort of emotional instability.

Some mothers tend to be loving one moment and then negligent the other minute this leaves a child feeling uncertain about their importance in an individual’s life causing anxiousness.

When the child is expected to be the mom themselves

sometimes children are forced to be grown-ups. This is given a term called parentification. This requires the child to behave and act like parents, providing directions and ways to cope up with challenges and difficulties faced by the family.

It is observed that some children take up this responsibility very well however other children who lack exposure and who are not equipped enough to handle the situation experience anxiety due to the pressure caused by the demand of acting maturely.

Critical comments and behaviors

another reason for children’s anxiety being triggered by their mothers could be the critical comments and behaviors that they carry out towards their children.

In some cases, these critical comments and behaviors might be unintentional and situational based while in other cases it might be intentional to give the child a hard pill.

Patents give out comments to the children thinking that it helps them to succeed and correct their mistakes however not realizing that these comments can be critical affecting a child’s mental state and further causing anxiety.

Lack of trust in the child’s judgment

It is often seen that children whose parents do not trust them completely are more vulnerable to anxiety than children who have a more neutral and cordial relationship with their parents with an abundance of trust and get between the two parties.

lack of trust on the mother’s side can be detrimental. This also affects a child’s decision-making abilities and judgments reducing their overall confidence and causing anxiety.

Lack of emotional attention

Many theories suggest a lack of cordial and strong emotional connection between the parents might lead to a strained relationship between the parent and the children.

Parental behaviors such as negligence, rejection, avoidance, and emotionally blunt behavior can stunt a child’s mental stability making them more vulnerable to anxiety.

Repeated silent treatment is given by the mother

Anxiety doesn’t need to be caused by harsh or demanding behavior on the parent’s side. It is seen that a silent treatment can also trigger a child’s anxiety.

Sure the mother tends to be unresponsive to children’s behaviors, and emotions regardless of its need for attention and acknowledgment.

this leaves the child feeling isolated making it a primary cause for triggering anxiety among the children.

What are the symptoms of anxiety that can be triggered by your mother?

Anxiety is characterized by a set of signs and symptoms such as:

  • Sweating
  • Difficulty in breathing
  • Shortness of breath
  • Sense of choking
  • Complaints of chest pain
  • Shaking or trembling
  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Dizziness or Lightheadedness
  • Fear of losing control over oneself and their environment
  • Fear of impending doom
  • Hot or cold flashes
  • Tingling or numbness
  • Increased heart rate

These symptoms vary in severity from person to person. However, it is noted that many people experience anxiety that is not significantly displayed.

What are the main triggers of anxiety?

Even though anxiety is seen among many individuals, certain triggers make some people more vulnerable to anxiety than others when triggered by their moms. Some contributing triggers of anxiety are:

Health diagnosis

An individual is more vulnerable to experiencing anxiety in the presence of chronic or serious health diagnoses such as cancer or diabetes.

Triggers associated with health diagnosis tend to have a strong impact on an individual because of the strong negative thoughts and emotions that are associated with it.


It is believed that many over-the-counter medications may contribute to the symptoms of anxiety in some individuals. This is certainly because of the ingredients in this medication that makes an individual feel uneasy.

Use of caffeine

Even though it is said that the use of caffeine helps to activate an individual’s system, studies show that over usage of caffeine might lead to adverse effects such as anxiety or even depression.

Apart from the overuse withdrawal from caffeine may also lead to anxiety. hence it is suggested that individuals take conscious amounts of caffeine per day.

Skipping meals

Apart from environmental factors ones eating habits might also contribute to an individual’s anxiety directly or indirectly. When an individual fails to maintain their food timings it might lead to fluctuations in their blood sugar levels.

These fluctuations might make an individual feel jittery which in turn triggers anxiety.

Hence maintaining a proper schedule and diet is important for various reasons not just for energy but also for maintaining one’s mood.

Negative thinking

An individual’s behavior and emotions are certainly controlled by one’s thoughts. When an individual is upset and dwells on negative thoughts it further leads to discomforting emotions and detrimental thoughts causing a vicious cycle.

These negative thoughts are then projected to various areas of an individual’s life creating an overall sense of lack of control over oneself and the environment which triggers anxiety.

Financial concerns

Many individuals experience anxiety due to their financial standing. Learning to manage financial triggers requires seeking professional help such as from a financial advisor.


Daily stressors as simple as traffic jams to major ones such as strained relationships might contribute to one’s intensity and frequency of anxiety and anxiety attacks.

However long term or chronic stress leads to long term anxiety and a build-up of negative taught processes and emotions that impact an individual’s mental health



individuals might also experience anxiety as a result of interpersonal or intrapersonal conflicts.

The inability to resolve these conflicts might lead to the buildup of negative thoughts, emotions that overwhelm an individual and trigger anxiety.

Personal triggers

Personal triggers can be as minor as a smell, place, or even a song that reminds an individual of negative and discomforting experiences. Personal triggers can remind an individual of an unconscious or conscious dramatic event in an individual’s life that triggers their anxiety.

If you can identify and understand your triggers, you can work to avoid them and learn to cope with them. You can learn specific coping strategies to handle the triggers when they happen.

Side Note: I have tried and tested various products and services to help with my anxiety and depression. See my top recommendations here, as well as a full list of all products and services our team has tested for various mental health conditions and general wellness.

What are some ways to manage anxiety caused by your mom?

Identify and acknowledge the triggers

The most significant strategy that can be used to control one’s anxiety is by identifying and acknowledging those triggers.

Being able to recognize what makes an individual anxious makes them better equipped to take action.

Relaxation techniques


Even though anxiety can be bought under an individual’s control it cannot be predicted. In such situations, it is necessary that an individual actively carries out relaxation techniques.

These might include meditation, yoga, and deep breathing which helps to reduce the intensity of anxiety within a short period.



A key to reducing the frequency and intensity of anxiety attacks could be spending time with close family and friends.

The kind of emotional and practical support provided by these social and personal groups help the person feel connected and aid in distracting one’s mind from negative and recurring thoughts that lead to anxiety.

Apart from friends and families, individuals can also consider speaking to groups of people that are experiencing similar problems.

Set realistic goals

When an individual is feeling overwhelmed, setting goals and targets keeping in mind priorities can help resolve overwhelming feelings of fear or panic.

Setting goals provides structure and routine to an individual’s life reducing space for uncertainty which can be a major trigger for anxiety in many cases.

Take up new challenges

Apart from doing activities that an individual is usually fond of and has expertise in, trying new and challenging activities that put an individual outside their comfort zone in a healthy manner may help reduce the stress and anger temporarily.

Signing up for new activities also provides a path to meeting people with similar stories and concerns.

Lifestyle changes

An individual’s lifestyle plays a major role in their experience of anxiety. An unhealthy and busy lifestyle usually leads to unhealthy eating, lack of exercise, lack of adequate sleep.

A combination of a well-set diet, exercise, and sleep can help to regulate an individual’s mood and equip them with a favorable coping mechanism.

These coping mechanisms in turn help to get control over once anxiety concerns in a more adaptable manner.

lack of proper diet, sleep, and exercise can make an individual sluggish, dependent, moody and vulnerable to anxiety attacks.

Making journal entries

Last but not least having a journal to write down how a person is feeling and thinking when they are anxious helps them to reflect upon their thoughts and feelings.

Putting down one’s thoughts and feelings onto a paper helps to provide a sense of temporary relief.

In the case of journal entry, a person does not even have to fear being judged by another person regarding their thoughts and feelings.

What are the therapy options for anxiety triggered by one’s mom?

Cognitive-behavioral therapy

Cognitive-behavioral therapy helps an individual to control their anxiety by using strategies like relaxation and breathing. It works on the principles of replacing negative thoughts with positive ones.

Exposure therapy

Exposure therapy is a kind of therapy in which an individual is exposed to a particular stimulus that they usually fear or are anxious about in a graded order.

As and when the individual gets comfortable with the situation or stimulus introduced or exposed to them with each session, individuals get more comfortable with a real-life situation that might have otherwise been a source for triggering anxiety.

Group therapy


It is based on the principle that when an individual interacts with other people who are suffering from the same fears they might not feel left alone or isolated. Group therapy usually involves a group of individuals who are experiencing similar symptoms and problems.


Anxiety can also be treated with the help of medication prescribed by a health care professional.

Though medication alone cannot help in reducing persistent anxiety it can help in restoring a sense of control and bring temporary relief. 

Online therapy  

In cases where reaching out physically to a professional is impossible or discomforting an individual can opt to seek help through the online medium. 

In this, the therapy sessions are carried out one-to-one over a video or audio call. Some individuals also prefer interacting with the therapist through text as well due to various reasons. One of the most common is the fear of being judged by the therapist or some personal hesitation. 

Online therapy can help individuals to regulate some aspects of their anxiety that aids individuals in carrying out a stress-free life over time


Parents are the primary caregivers for many children. Parents are the first source of contact with whom the children spent most of their time.

It is natural for many children to experience anxiety that is triggered by the interaction or relationship patterns that they share with their parents.

In many families, children are seen being close to one of the two parents. this closeness leads to increased dependence on a parent for their social and personal requirements.

Even though mothers are considered to be more understanding and loving than fathers they may be the primary reason for triggering anxiety amongst their children.

Though the cause of anxiety might be unintentional many parents neglect the discomforting emotions that the children experience and complain of routing from their relationship or interaction with the mother.

The child and the mother need to realize that to avoid such discomforting emotions and thoughts they must convey their emotions, feelings, and needs with one another.

Frequently asked questions (FAQ)

Can parents trigger anxiety?

Parents are a very important part of a child’s life. Parents can contribute to their child’s anxiety even without realizing it by the way they interact with their children.

What to do when your mom stresses you out?

It is natural for people to experience stress due to their interaction or relationship with their parents. In situations where your primary caregiver who lives in the same houses causes stress escaping a stressful and environment might get difficult.

However, some techniques that one can adopt to relax are listening to relaxing music or carrying out pleasurable activities. in addition to this one can also distance themselves from the other person who triggered the stress.

Is it okay to be afraid of your mom?

Some parents might be stricter and firmer than others. In extreme cases, they might be abusive both physically and emotionally.

Being afraid of such parents Is a natural response for many children.

Why are children scared of their parents?

Many children report being afraid of their parents because they do not wish to go against their parents or get them upset about anything they do.

Who are toxic parents?

Toxic parents are those who behave in ways that cause fear and guilt in their children. They might also yell too much or do potentially damaging things to their kids.