Depressed because of a girl (+ 3 coping tips)

This article will discuss what can cause you to get depressed because of a girl, or because you are in love with someone. Along with that, the article will show what are ways you can cope with this feeling.

Depressed because of a girl

Sometimes love doesn’t happen the way you may want it to. The girl you love may have someone in their life already, or she may just not feel the same as you do. When that is the case, love may not feel so great, and it can cause you to feel extremely sad. Some may say even depressed.

The rejection can lead to depression when it leads you to question your worth, makes you feel hopeless, or like you only have negative things in your life. But it is important to know the difference between sadness and depression. 

Depression is a clinical condition that causes the person to feel intense sadness and lose interest in all areas of their lives. For a person to be considered depressed, they usually need to experience its symptoms for longer than two weeks.

So even though to some people not being able to get a girl can affect them in a deeper sense, and make them depressed. To others, it can make them extremely sad, but it won’t always be depression. 

To some people that might already have other forms of mental illness, going through such rejection can add up to it. So what is important when dealing with love is to identify how good or how bad it is making you feel.

And although people are not replaceable, you may want to remember that there is more to life than a relationship. Not being with that person can allow you to focus more energy on yourself, your work, or other things you love. 

Understand that someone not wanting you doesn’t make you undesirable. Not everyone will please everyone. With time you will most likely find people that are interested in you in that way and will want to build a beautiful relationship with you.

While that doesn’t happen, focus your energy on yourself, and try to live the best life you can. But if you notice being in love with that girl is bringing you down, there are some ways you can cope with that feeling.

How can I cope with being depressed because of a girl? 

If you are in love with a girl and noticed it hasn’t been good for you, and your mental health, there are some things you can do. Here are ways for you to cope with being depressed because of a girl.

Move from the negative thinking 

Wanting a girl that is not in love with you can cause you to experience deep feelings of rejection. And those can put you in a negative spiral of thoughts. Try to stay away from them. Keep in mind that it is impossible to be desired by everyone.

And even though it is important to embrace your sadness, and know that this is a part of life, know that this shouldn’t be a frequent thing in your life. Open yourself to other feelings.

Accept what you can’t change

You should always have in mind that it is impossible to make people love you. And don’t put the acceptance of others as what validates your self-esteem and self-worth. Know that you deserve love, and it will come to you in time. 

Take your time 

Always have in mind that the notion of love is different from one person to the next. The thing is to try and find people that have a closer notion to yours, and this can take time. If you know what you are looking for, you can enjoy the time you have by focusing on yourself. 

During that time, you can cultivate new interests or hobbies, and open yourself up to new possibilities.

Have distractions 

Find things you love that can help you lose focus from all that negative thinking. It can be going on a hike, spending time with friends, or watching a show you love. Doing things you enjoy is a great way to stay clear from the blues.

Discover what this has taught you 

Although being rejected is never easy, there are always lessons to be learned from it. It can allow you to know more about yourself, how you handle frustration, and your relationships. 

Taking something from this rejection can help you think about what you want for your next one. This is a great way to let go of what could have been. Instead of focusing on the past, look at what you want different in the future.

Talk about it

Having people to talk about your unrequited love is always important. It can be a friend, a family member, or even a therapist. When you vent about what went on, it helps you deal with your feelings, and also let them go.

But don’t obsess over it 

But sometimes you may put such an intense focus on this situation that it can feel like it is ruling your life. Take your time to vent, but also keep an active life, and have in mind that there is so much more to it than a relationship.

Remember you are not alone 

Have in you the notion that people will experience love in many ways during their lifetime. And rejection is a part of it. You are not alone, this is a recognizable pain, from which all of us will move on at some point.

Keep yourself open 

Because everyone will move on, it is important to keep yourself open. Know that a future love can come from where you least expect it and let people in. Go out, mingle, and give yourself the chance to be surprised by a new love.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ): What can I do if I am depressed because of a girl?

How does it feel to be in love with a girl? 

Being in love with a girl can lead to a rush of feelings. It not only impacts how you feel but also your behaviors. You can feel like you are going through a roller coaster. There will be times of euphoria when you feel on cloud nine.

It can make you feel more energetic,  and sleeping can become a problem. It also causes your heart to beat faster, and your breathing to speed up. It also causes you to constantly think about the person, and imagine your life with them.

You might only see the positive sides to them because you tend to realize your partner. And when you go through a challenge with this person, it can lead to increased attraction. 

Being in love also causes you to obsessively think about your loved one, this can be because people that are in love have lower serotonin levels, which can lead to intrusive thoughts. 

But being in love may also mean you will experience emotional dependency on your partner, making you feel desperate at the mere thought of losing them.

You may become too empathetic towards your loved one, and because of that, it is possible to have a long-term, loving relationship. It also means you will align your priorities along with your partners, which will work towards building a life together.

Which can lead to an emotional union, and possessive feelings. 

Why do I feel sad when I think about love? 

Love can arouse many feelings in people. And to some, it can often be negative. Some may feel anxious because being in love threatens a defense mechanism they created during their life as a reaction to pain and rejection. This can make the person feel extremely vulnerable, which can even cause them to try and avoid the feeling.

Being close to their partner can also bring on intense sadness. This closeness can trigger some traumatic childhood memories, and fear of being abandoned. When that is the case, people may fear that they will get hurt the same way as they did when they were children.

Love can also affect the sense of identity the person has. This can happen because once they get hurt, they can think that opening themselves up again would shatter this identity they have created. 

They can feel that their parents haven’t helped them create a good notion of identity, so if they fall in love, and get rejected, their notion of themselves would be destroyed.

Other people may have trouble accepting love because opening themselves up to someone else will disconnect them to that fantasy bond they have with their parents, which is the only positive and important connection.

Loving someone else also opens you up to dealing with some existential issues. You will need to confront the mortality of your partner and yourself. Which can be extremely hard. 

What is the difference between love and crush?

A crush is usually a brief feeling of infatuation, that is mostly based on physical attraction, and happens right away as you see the person. When you have a crush on someone you usually don’t see anything negative in them. 

But love is an intense feeling of affection that goes in for a long time. Love is usually based on trust, understanding, and affection, and it is developed little by little. When you are in love you see the negative sides of the person and you accept them. 

How can I make someone miss me?

There are some ways you can make someone miss you. The first thing to do is to make yourself less available. Don’t text them, and if they write to you, take some time to answer. 

You can also make them miss you if you make a mark in their memory. You can do that by having a topic, a scent, or a favorite food that you have talked about, that can lead them to remember you by it.

Share with them interesting facts about your life. They will know how much is going on in your life, and that you are not only waiting for them to get in touch or ask you out. And always leave them craving more.

When do you know your relationship is over?

You will know your relationship is over when you don’t want to share that much with them anymore, and the emotional connection just feels off and you don’t want to work on trying it again. 


This article explained why you might feel depressed because of a girl, or because you are in love with someone. Along with that, it showed what are ways for you to cope with that feeling.

If you have any questions or comments about this article, feel free to write them in the section below.


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