Attending skills examples (Top 7)

The current blogspot will be based on the question “what are the examples of attending skills?”. We will elaborate on various examples of using attending skills in our routine life.

What are the examples of attending skills?

Attending skills are used in our daily routine communication across all spheres of life. The attending skills help us better understand other people and help us strengthen our relations. The attending skills help us in making our communication effective.

Following are some of the examples of attending skills : 

  • When a teacher calls out the name of the student and asks questions relating to the chapter being taught in the class during the interactive session, there are more chances that the student will be better connected with the teacher. Further if the teacher uses head nodding to depict the child that she is listening to and maintains eye contact, the rapport between the teacher and the student will be positive in that moment.
  • When a child tends to walk to a mother who is reading a book, the child will feel better connected to the mother if the mother focuses her attention on the child instead of keeping her eyes on the book while the child speaks about his problem. In this way the child will feel an emotional distance from the mother if the mother does not attend well to the child and only hears while reading the book.
  • In a counseling session if the counselor sits back in a closed arm posture and does not maintain eye contact with the client, the client will not feel encouraged to share his problem and will resist sharing his problems and trust the therapist. In such a case, not attending well to the client ends up in poor rapport between the client and the therapist.
  • While a rape client cries the counselor sits quietly while focusing his all attentin to the client and being there for the client without interrupting her crying or asking the reason of her crying. Thus the attending skills of the counselor will establish the client’s trust towards the counselor.
  • In office settings if the boss shouts at the employee for being late to work without listening to the complete excuse the employee will feel that the boss is inconsiderate and lacks empathy. However if the same boss attends well to the employee while he explains his reason for being late to work and shows regard by being concerned for her problem, the employee will feel understood and will definitely try to focus more on the work.
  • In a parlor if a hairdresser does not attend well to the customer and rather keeps focusing on whatever is running in her head, she might end up ruining the client’s hair and hence will lose the client forever. The same hairdresser, if attends the customer well by listening to whatever she requires and shows her attention towards the customer will end up having a valued customer.
  • A husband listens to wife’s complaint regarding his attitude by attending to her words and focusing on her emotions during the conversation. The wife after sharing all her concerns and knowing that she is being heard, will eventually feel better and the husband will be in a better position to fulfill the need by sorting out the situation.
  • A school counselor can help the student to exactly identify his school feelings by attending him well through the skills of verbal and non verbal communication and using probing techniques to help him connect with his feelings after being bullied by his classmates. Instead of only psychoeducating the student, using attending skills to identify his emotional needs builds a better communication process between the school counselor and the student.
  • A father listens to and attends to the son’s concerns for not choosing the family profession of being a doctor and instead going to physiotherapy as a career choice. This will prevent the father from getting into a conflicting situation with the son or reaching a deadlock. The son will also feel heard and listened to without being interrupted by the father. Later the father may explain to the son why becoming a professional MBBS doctor is more important than becoming a physiotherapist. Thus the son will also not feel that the family profession was imposed upon him by his father.
  • A doctor attends well to the patient so that the patient feels that the doctor is concerned about his issues and is there to provide help to ease his pain and worry.
  • We are more inclined to talk to a friend about our issues as compared to our extended relationships, knowing the fact that our friends will listen to us and use attending skills to understand our situation and connect to us on emotional grounds unlike our extended family members who mostly have preconceived notions about our scenarios and often judge our choices.


The current blogspot was based on the question “ what are the examples of attending skills ?”. We focused on the various daily life examples of attending skills in life across different platforms.

Frequently asked questions (FAQs): Attending skills examples 

What are the 4 attending behaviors?

The 4 attending behaviors are :

  • Eye contact
  • Body language
  • Referring to speaker by name
  • Verbal affirmations

What are the five sub skills of attending in Counselling?

  • Attending
  • Summarizing
  • Clarification
  • Paraphrasing
  • Reflection

What are attending skills in communication?

Attending skills in communication are the conscious efforts to pay physical and emotional attention to the other person during the process of communication with the maximum use of verbal and non verbal skills and showing empathy and genuineness to the client.

How can I improve my attending skills?

The following are the best strategies to improve your attending skills :

  • Use role play to practice and learn attending skills
  • Talk and interact with people in your surroundings so you have a chance to practice attending skills in real life.
  • Practice giving positive feedback and positive affirmations, showing empathy and regard for the people around you.


7 Basic Attending Skills (you may need)