Hey Optimist Minds!
Love is a fascinating and wonderful part of life that often gets romantisised because of it’s unique nature. When we’re in love, we think, feel, and behave differently than we usually would. Because of that, it’s a little difficult to know the difference between true love and attachment.
Unfortunately, attachment isn’t always wonderful as love. In fact, when unhealthy, attachment can lead to a host of problems for everyone involved. Sometimes, romantic relationships get the two feelings mixed up, causing one or both partners to get consumed by it.
When that happens, ups and downs in the relationship become frequent and intense, spreading the consequences to all other areas of life. You’re left feeling restless, unsettled, and a little lost.
It’s important to recognise when you’re getting overwhelmed by your relationship so you can take a step back and reflect on how it is impacting you. This video will list the signs so that you can know it’s happening to you.
We want our viewers to know that being overwhelmed does not necessarily imply the lack of true love. However, for the sake of yours and your partner’s wellbeing, you must figure out how to make things healthier. Perhaps seeing a couples therapist might be of help.
Now, here are seven signs you are overwhelmed by your relationship.
You’re confused about feelings.
Are you unsure of whether you or your partner still feels the same way about each other? Are you frequently worried that you might be drifting apart?
There are many reasons why you might start having these concerns. For example, maybe your past life experiences gave you an insecure attachment style, making you fear abandonment. Or, it could be that your partner is going through an tough time, causing them to be emotionally unavailable.
No matter what the reason, if the two of you can’t resolve the problem with communication, you might start feeling scared and exhausted.
You’re not getting enough rest.
Are you losing sleep because of this relationship? You might be staying up thinking about your partner or possibly because they need you to take care of them. When a relationship starts interfering with your need for rest, it can’t be good for you, even if you fall head over heels in love.
A rested mind and body are capable of loving better than when they’re sleep deprived. That includes both romantic and self-love. Otherwise, you either start feeling friction or you become self-sacrificing.
You worry about the future of this relationship.
At times, relationships reach a point where there may or may not be a future to them. This can happen if partners have to start living in different cities or their careers take away large chunks of their time. It could also happen if your partner is having second thoughts about being with you.
If you spend a lot of time worrying about how things will pan out between the two of you, it’s likely that you’re getting overwhelmed.
There’s a lot of drama.
Do you and your partner often get into fights? Perhaps you’ve fallen into a routine or breaking up and then making up. Drama refers to an emotional state where one or both people in a relationship create an uncomfortable feeling through manipulation or control.
In simpler terms, it means unnecessary conflicts that don’t involve solution-oriented conversations and might seem a bit immature. It’s never easy to face drama in love and it tends to make people feel engulfed.
You’re less productive.
Are you unable to perform your best at work, school, or other important areas of your life? Is your relationship taking away most of your energy and resources?
You can know for sure that it is overwhelming you if you’re struggling with things that you were originally very good at.
Notice if you see a pattern between the drop in productivity and the timeline of your connection with your partner. You might be surprised to find that each incident of drama coincided with an issue at work.
Your body resists intimacy.
When your partner tries to touch you, either lovingly or sexually, do you feel a resistance inside you? Are you less inclined to have sex or be vulnerable in front of them?
Sometimes our body speaks up before we can wrap our heads around the reality of the situation.
Mentally, you might still think that you’re madly in love. But when it comes to being close with your partner, you sense some hesitation to let them in. Don’t ignore these signals as they could indicate that this love is harming you.
You feel anxious around your partner.
You can be sure that the relationship has become a bit toxic for you if being near your partner makes you nervous. Do you start thinking about how they’ll react to everything you say or do? Maybe you feel scared that they’ll hurt you or push you away.
If you stop feeling comfortable around your go to person, it’s a red flag that something might be off.
Were you able to resonate with the situations we described? Do you think you might be getting overwhelmed by your relationship? Let us know your thoughts in the comments. We’d love to hear from you.
A link for further reading and the studies & references used in the making of this video are mentioned in the description below.
Thanks for visiting optimist minds, take care. Until next time.